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HALLOWEEN MEMORIES

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IN MEMORY OF
Lucas Christopher Ross "Luke"
21
October 31, 1979 - April 3, 2001
Acute Bronchopneumonia











'TWAS HALLOWEEN NIGHT

'Twas Halloween night and all near the house,
Lots of creatures were stirring, the ghosts were aroused.
The pumpkins were carved and lit up with care.
Trick-or-treaters were roaming..... but he wasn't there.

Children were gathered at my door and said...
"Trick-or-Treat, Halloween, we want to be fed".
Decked out in their costumes from shoes to their caps.
I gave them some candy, went back in to relax.

Then out on the porch arose such a clatter,
I sprang to my feet to see what was the matter.
Away to the front door I flew like a flash.
The noise made me shutter, then I heard a crash.

The moon on the crest of the pumpkin's bright glow
Gave the luster of midnight to creatures below.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear
But a cute little ghost.... I had nothing to fear.

He seemed so happy, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment he was no longer sick.
More rapid than bats his ghost friends they came,
And they all carried pumpkins with beautiful flames.

"Now mothers, now fathers, now sisters, and brothers
And family, and friends, and all of the others....
In the heavens we live, and we'll come when you call.
Just call us, just call us, just call us all."

As October witches on Halloween fly,
When they sail on their brooms up to the sky.
So up to the heavens his ghost friends they flew,
Then back down to earth to see me and you.

And then in a twinkling, I heard on the roof.
The whispers and giggles of each little ghost.
Then one little ghost appeared on the ground.
He came from the roof without making a sound.

He was dressed all in white from his head to his foot,
His clothes were like silk and he carried a book.
A cute little pumpkin he had in his clasp.
As he opened the book I sighed and I gasped.

His eyes how they twinkled, his smile was so merry.
His hands were so gentle, but I was so weary.
His touch was the softest that I'd ever know.
And the pumpkin he held had a beautiful glow.

As I stood there and watched him I felt a great peace.
And a bright light encircled his head like a wreath.
He had a sweet face and a wonderful grin
That beamed when he laughed from his ears to his chin.

He nodded and knew that I needed some help.
I cried when I saw him in spite of myself.
The spark in his eyes and the glow 'round his head,
Soon gave me to know that he wasn't so dead.

He spoke not a word but went straight to his work
As he checked off my name in his book, under hurt.
He looked at me gently and wrinkled his nose,
He gave me a hug, to the clouds he arose.

He joined all his ghost friends and blew me a kiss
And away they all flew even though they'll be missed.
I heard him exclaim as he flew out of sight.....
"Mom, we'll be back again next HALLOWEEN night."

© 2006 - Christine Ross
~in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001











YOUR PRESENCE IS EVERYWHERE

October repaints the summer landscape.
A fragrant chill engulfs the air.
October possesses a keen sense of you.
In October... your presence is everywhere.

October winds gently carry your soul
As they whisper to me your sweet name.
October leaves fall to the ground once again
Proclaiming... "nothing ever stays the same".

October sky in a contrast of blue
Opens that door from beyond the clouds.
October sunshine warms my broken heart
Saying... "today no sadness allowed."

October moonlight displays a soft halo,
A likeness of the one that you wear.
October colors fill transparent eyes
Tinting... all of my waiting tears.

October nights with sedating memories
Of rock-a-bye baby to sleep.
October mornings awaken my mind
With dreams... that are mine forever to keep.

October resurrects secret pleasures,
Obsessions I'll always hold dear.
October possesses a keen sense of you.
In October... your presence is everywhere.

© 2008 - Christine Ross
~in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001











Now, Halloween
of course, may mean
things very weird
and ghostlike;

I wish it meant an
evening spent
with you, - that's
what I'd most like.












IT'S HALLOWEEN

It's Halloween! It's Halloween!
The moon is full and bright
And we shall see what can't be seen
On any other night.

In masks and gowns
We haunt the street
And knock on doors
For trick or treat.

Tonight we are
The king and queen,
For oh tonight
It's Halloween!












THE PUMPKIN MAN

.....by John McCutcheon

There's something in my garden
So big and orange and round
It started just a little seed
When I stuck it in the ground
But now it doesn't look at all
Like what it did last spring
Hey, won't somebody tell me
What the heck you call this thing?
Oh, the pumpkin man
With a big, round head
Smile so bright
And eyes so red
I wish jack-o-lanterns hung from the sky
And the seas were made of pumpkin pie

My mommy and my daddy
My dog and my pal, John
Ran out to the garden
To see what was going on
My mommy said, "It's squash, my son"
My daddy called it spice
John just laughed and my dog just barked
and jumped up once or twice

Then John said, "Ain't you never seen
"A pumpkin plant before?
"Why, you carve 'em up for Halloween
"And you stick 'em right by your door
"With two big eyes and a funny nose
"And a toothy smile below
"Then you stick a candle in its head
"To make the whole thing glow."

So now I grow up pumpkins
For my neighbors all around
But still I just don't understand
How they get so big and round
My mommy says, "It's nature"
My dad says, "A miracle"
John just laughs and my dog just barks
And I like that best of all.












TRICK OR TREAT

.....by Geof Johnson

The very best part of Halloween
Is getting more candy than you've ever seen.
I've got my scariest costume on.
I scare myself when I'm all alone.

Sun goes down, I'm all dressed up,
I set out to try my luck.
Walkin' up and down the street,
I knock on the door and say.....

Trick or treat, trick or treat,
Give me something good to eat.
Trick or treat, trick or treat,
Give me something good to eat.
The very first house is big and dark,
I get scared when I hear the dog bark.

I'm gonna be brave and move my feet.
I knock on the door and say.....
Trick or treat, trick or treat,
Give me something good to eat.
Trick or treat, trick or treat,
Give me something good to eat.

The very next house is big and white,
All fixed up for Halloween night.
They have a big pumpkin by the street,
I knock on the door and say�

Trick or treat, trick or treat,
Give me something good to eat.
Trick or treat, trick or treat,
Give me something good to eat.

If you go out Halloween night,
I'll give you a tip that'll make it alright.
Smile at everyone that you meet.
Knock on the door and say.....

Trick or treat, trick or treat,
Give me something good to eat.
Trick or treat, trick or treat,
Give me something good to eat.












MAKING JACK-O-LANTERNS

.....Anonymous

Just take a golden pumpkin
Of quite the largest size,
Cut all 'round the stem, just so,
Scrape out the inside below,
And cut two holes for eyes.
And now fix a nose beneath,
And such a great big mouth with teeth,
And you've a jack-o'-lantern!

Then fix a tallow candle,
Just big enough to light,
And when it flickers, see him blink,
And when it flares up, see him wink
And smile so broad and bright.
This is the jolliest sort of a fellow,
With cheery face so round and yellow,
This funny jack-o'-lantern.












Witch and ghost make merry
on this last of dear October's days.

~Author Unknown












When witches go riding,
and black cats are seen,
the moon laughs and whispers,
'tis near Halloween.

~Author Unknown,












Shadows of a thousand years rise again unseen,
Voices whisper in the trees, "Tonight is Halloween!"

~Dexter Kozen












HALLOWEEN

.....by Mary Jane Carr

Witches flying past on broomsticks,
Black cats leaping here and there,
White-robed spooks on every corner,
Mournful moaning in the air,

Goblins peering out of windows,
Spirit-things that rap and run-
But don't be scared-it's just October,
Having one last hour of fun!












Once in a young lifetime
one should be allowed to have
as much sweetness as one can possibly
want and hold.

~Judith Olney












Backward, turn backward,
O Time, in your flight
make me a child again
just for to-night!

~Elizabeth Akers Allen












You wouldn't believe
On All Hallow Eve
What lots of fun we can make,
With apples to bob,
And nuts on the hob,
And a ring-and-thimble cake.

~Carolyn Wells












When black cats prowl and pumpkins gleam,
May luck be yours on Halloween.

~Author Unknown












FIVE LITTLE PUMPKINS

.....by Geof Johnson

Five little pumpkins sitting on a gate,
The first one said,
"Oh my, it's getting late."
The second one said,
"But we don't care."
The third one said,
"I see witches in the air."
The fourth one said,
"Let's run, and run, and run."
The fifth one said,
"Get ready for some fun."

~Author Unknown













SPOOKS

.....Sandra Liatsos

There's a goblin at my window,
A monster by my door.
The pumpkin at my table
Keeps on smiling more and more.
There's a ghost who haunts my bedroom,
A witch whose face is green.
They used to be my family,
Till they dressed for Halloween.













HALLOWEEN?

.....from TCF

It is here, this day of merriment
and children's pleasure.
Gremlins and goblins
and ghosties at the door
of your house.
And the other children
come to the door of your mind.
Faces out of the past,
small ghosts with sweet, painted faces.
They do not shout.
Those children
who no longer march laughing
on cold Halloween night,
they stand at the door of your mind -
and you will let them in,
so that you can give them
the small gifts of Halloween -
a smile and a tear.











Somewhere there is a stairway
That leads us to a door
Where memories of Halloween
Turn back time to once before.

© 2010 Christine Ross











OCTOBER

O

"O" is for OCTOBER
and pumpkins that are ORANGE.

C

"C" is for us CRYING
happy tears when he boy was born.

T

"T" is for TRICK-OR-TREATING
on scary Halloween nights.

O

"O" is for my ONLY son
Who held me OH so tight.

B

"B" is for my BABY BOY
that I BROUGHT home with me.

E

"E" is for... my EVERYTHING
that he grew-up to be.

R

"R" is for REMEMBERING
his Halloween Birthday.


Tears again... in OCTOBER
just because he went away.

© 2004 - Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001






AN UNEXPECTED TEARDROP

In 1979 I became pregnant for the second time. In those days there wasn't the option of knowing the sex of your child. I wanted a little boy so bad, but I dared not whisper those words in fear that it would not come true. I already had a beautiful little two year old girl that I loved beyond words. But a little boy would just make everything perfect!

It was October and we were living in Idaho. The landscape in our little town had taken on the beauty and majesty of fall. On a cold Halloween morning, my little pumpkin was already on his way into this world. After a very long and difficult labor my sweet little baby was born. I just couldn't believe it.... it was Luke the Spook! I was so very happy to meet my little boy. As I held him for the very first time... an unexpected teardrop rolled down my face.

From that day on Luke and I were inseparable. Wherever I was, Luke wanted to be. Oh how much I loved him and oh how much he loved me. He was so much fun. Everyday I looked forward to what he would do or say. Sometimes he would make me laugh so hard....that an unexpected teardrop would find its way out.

No one has ever loved me like Luke loved me. When I was with Luke I was number one and it made me feel absolutely wonderful. He always wanted to sit by me, to hold my hand, to give me hugs, and to say he loved me. I remember when he was about 3 years old he said..."Mommy, when I grow up I want to marry you." I said... "But Luke, I am already married to Daddy." He said... "But I want to marry you." I tried to explain the difference in the love between a mommy and a daddy ... and the love between a mommy and her son. I failed miserably in my explanation, and he still thought that he could one day marry me. I told him that someday when he was older he would fall in love with a special girl and marry her. He said..."No Mommy, I will always love you." Then there it was again..... that unexpected teardrop.

As the years went by, and he began growing up he realized that he just might some day fall in love. He finally understood the difference in the two kinds of love, but he never stopped loving me in his special way and he would defend me no matter what. He would say..."Don't you be mean to my mommy". It was just a few months before Luke died at the age of 21 when he and I were walking across the parking lot of Sam's club. A car sped by me and I had to jump back to keep from being hit. Luke screamed across the parking lot at the driver..."Watch where you are going, that's my mom." He made me feel 10 feet tall and once again..... an unexpected teardrop fell.

I was so blessed, and I knew I was blessed. How could someone so beautiful and sweet and gentle love me so much? I had no answer to that question, but I do know that in his eyes I could do no wrong. I still can't believe that I was lucky enough to be loved like that. I miss him so much. I want to hear all those little boy words... "I love you Mommy", "Sit by me Mommy", "Hold me close Mommy." I want to hear all of those grown-up words.... "I love you Mom", "Can we talk Mom", "Let's sit in the swing and watch the sunset Mom." I have missed those words for a very, very long time. My son died and left me here with silence and emptiness. No more words, no more hugs, no more laughs, no more, no more, no more. My blessing, my life all turned into..... an unexpected teardrop.

Till this very day I am thankful for having such a loving person in my life for twenty-one wonderful years. It all ended way too soon. It should have changed at the end of my life, not at the end of his. But even with Luke's death I knew I was so blessed to have experienced his love. Someday soon I will be blessed again when we meet in Heaven. I will hear those long-lost words..."I love you Mom", "Can we talk Mom", "Let me show you around Mom". And as I gaze upon that shining face of his I will know that nothing was ever really lost. My little pumpkin was just waiting for me to catch up to him. As I reach for his hand, and hold him close once again, I will for the very last time experience..... an unexpected teardrop.

2015 Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001





SOMEDAY SON

Sometimes I think I can't make it.
I feel like my chest will explode.
It's been too many empty years
That I've had to carry this load.

Sometimes it's just one little word
That reminds me of the past
Or just the sight of something
That makes me shiver and gasp.

Sometimes in late October
I feel a lonely teardrop fall
When I come upon a pumpkin
And my mind relives it all.

Sometimes in the early spring
When April comes around
I feel another teardrop
Go tumbling to the ground.

Sometimes I wonder why I'm here.
I could drown in these tears by now.
I've lived so long without you son
And I honestly don't know how.

Someday this pain will go away.
These teardrops will be no more.
And I'll be looking for you son
As I walk through Heaven's door.


2015 - Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001




EVERYBODY HURTS

When the day is long and the night < br> The night is yours alone
When you're sure you've had enough
Of this life, well hang on

Don't let yourself go, 'cause everybody cries
And everybody hurts sometimes

Sometimes everything is wrong
Now it's time to sing along
When your day is night alone
(Hold on, hold on)
If you feel like letting go
(Hold on)
When you think you've had too much
Of this life, well hang on

'Cause everybody hurts take comfort in your friends
Everybody hurts

Don't throw your hand oh, no don't throw your hand
If you feel like you're alone, no, no, no, you are not alone

If you're on your own in this life
The days and nights are long
When you think you've had too much
Of this life to hang on

Well, everybody hurts sometimes, everybody cries
And everybody hurts sometimes

And everybody hurts sometimes so, hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on
Everybody hurts
No, no, no, no, you are not alone

~ WRITTEN & PERFORMED BY: R.E.M.

THE STROKE OF MIDNIGHT

It was late October, the night was perfect outside but I was inside in a noisy & crowded room. As I looked out across the room, in the distance I saw this incredibly handsome man. Our eyes met and I ran over to him. I had never met this man before that night, but we hit it off perfectly. We spent hours upon hours together laughing at the silliest things. From that night on the more I got to know this incredible man, the more I loved him. Our love was something indescribable. We did so many things together.... movies, lunches, TV, shopping, laughing, joking, and we even had some very special heartfelt talks together. It was great! This went on for months.

On that amazing night that we met, when I ran up to him from across the room, I turned to him at the stroke of midnight and said...."Happy 21st birthday Luke." You see, my only son had become a man. It was the first time I had ever known him as a man. We were in Las Vegas at a casino and it was October 30th, 2000, just a few minutes before midnight. It would soon be Halloween, Luke's 21st birthday. Luke was sitting at a slot machine with his hand on the lever waiting for midnight. He was impatiently checking his watch anticipating that moment. When that moment happened I was standing right next to him along with his older sister and his Dad. When he pulled that lever we all cheered... "Happy 21st birthday Luke!" As a waitress passed, Luke stopped her and said..."I'd like a JD and coke, please." She looked suspiciously at him and said ..."Well, I need to see some ID." So with an exaggerated grin on his face, as he was reaching for his back pocket, he confidently said..."No problem." She looked at his ID and said..."You have only been 21 for a few minutes". Luke said..."That's right, and I would like a JD and coke, please." I can't even put into words the happiness I saw in his eyes and the happiness I felt for him. Oh what a wonderful night it was! He drank a little too much that night but 'what the heck', he was at his prime, he was a man, he was twenty-one, he was my son, and there was no way we were going to deny him his freedom that he had finally gained.

It was only a little over 5 months from that night when Luke died alone in his room from acute bronchopneumonia. For a few short months I got to know my son as a man, a privilege denied to many. I will forever have those wonderful memories of that awesome night when my boy became a man. When I close my eyes at midnight this October 30th the memory of that sensational grin will guide me into Halloween as I say for the fourteenth time since that Las Vegas Halloween night ....."HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY LUKE".

2014 Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001
< BR>




TWENTY-ONE AGAIN

October and golden leaves are falling,
Drifting slowly to the ground in the wind.
It's Halloween, It's Luke's Birthday,
And he's twenty-one again.

With the changing of the trees around me,
There is a beauty in their dying leaves,
And if I listen really close,
His voice whispers in the breeze.

Like the trees that are barren in winter,
And are reborn again in early spring,
Luke's not gone no more than the trees.
He's alive in everything.

Light a candle on this Halloween night,
In honor of Lucas Christopher Ross.
He journeyed to a better place,
And he took that step across.

So every October when leaves are golden,
And tumbling to the ground in the wind,
Remember that it's Luke's Birthday,
And he's twenty-one again.


2001 - Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001


TIME AFTER TIME

Lying in my bed I hear the clock tick,
And think of you
Turning in circles confusion
Is nothing new
Flashback to warm nights
Almost left behind
Suitcase of memories,
Time after...

Sometimes you picture me
I'm walking too far ahead
You're calling to me, I can't hear
What you have said
And you say go slow
I've fallen behind
The second hand unwinds

If you're lost you can look and you will find me
Time after time
If you fall I will catch you I'll be waiting
Time after time
If you fall I will catch you I will be waiting
Time after time
Time after time

After your picture fades and darkness has
Turned to grey
Watching through windows I'm wondering
If you're OK
And you say go slow
I've fallen behind
The drum beats out of time

If you're lost you can look and you will find me
Time after time
If you fall I will catch you I'll be waiting
Time after time
If you fall I will catch you I will be waiting
Time after time
Time after time


~ AS PERFORMED BY: Eva Cassidy
~ WORDS AND MUSIC BY: Cyndi Lauper and Rob Hyman

GOING HOME

Summer was gone and the landscape had been repainted with vibrant colors. It was October 1979. We were living in the beautiful little farming community of Soda Springs, Idaho with its population of 3,000 and soon to be 3,001. Our daughter Emily was 2 years old and I was 8 months pregnant waiting for the birth of Luke. The air was filled with a fragrant chill and the colors of Autumn had descended upon this little town. Halloween had also made its presence known with decorations on almost every door and window. On weekends we would go to the little town park and let Emily play on the swings and run across the baseball field. There was also a natural geyser in town that would shoot high into the clear blue October sky. Emily loved to watch it as she pointed and giggled. We loved walking downtown and browsing in the stores. There was a pharmacy there with an original ice cream bar with the old-time swivel bar stools. Emily loved to sit high upon the stool and spin while waiting for her ice cream cone. On Sundays after church we would take drives past the farmland and the mountains. That October sunshine warmed our hearts, soft winds whispered to us, Autumn leaves gently fell around us, moonlight reflected in our eyes, until the last day of October brought to us a pleasure that held a secret. On Halloween, October 31, 1979 Luke was born in a little hospital right there in town. That memorable October was one that would tug on our hearts forever. We lived in Soda Springs for the first year of Luke's life and I possess those sedating memories of rocking my baby boy to sleep. Luke grew up knowing all about Soda Springs and what a wonderful adventure it was for all of us. Shortly after Luke's 21st and last birthday he told me that he was thinking about someday going back to Soda Springs. He never got that opportunity. That secret from twenty-one years ago was revealed. Luke died on April 3, 2001, about 6 months after he told me he wanted to go back home, back to his birthplace.

A few months ago my husband Robin and I decided to spend the evening watching a movie. So he began searching for a movie under the NEW RELEASES for Netflix Instant. As he was scrolling through I said...."Oh my God! Look at the name of that movie." Robin said..."Oh my God". The name of the movie was SODA SPRINGS..... the name of the town that Luke was born in. I said..."You don't really think it could be about Soda Springs, Idaho do you?" Robin said... "Well, I don't know anywhere else it could be." I knew that Soda Springs' population was still about the same and couldn't imagine that a movie would be written about that little town.

As we started watching this movie called SODA SPRINGS we recognized that the very first scenes in the movie were in the little town that Luke was born in. There was the Geyser that was the town's namesake, the same geyser that we enjoyed so very many years ago, right there on the screen. We noticed that in the movie everyone had Idaho license plates, so we were sure that it was Soda Springs, Idaho. There was the farm land that we used to drive by, there were the mountains, there was the park, there was downtown Soda Springs. It was all there, all those memories from 1979!

We were so amazed and were so excited that there was a movie, from 2011 that was about the town that Luke was born in. It was a story about modern-day cowboys. But there unfolding on the screen was more than just a movie, it was a story full of memories and signs from Luke. The main character had a son, and his son's name was Christopher (Luke's middle name). The little boy played baseball in the same park where we used to take Emily and Luke to play. The main character's name was EDEN and he had been in a car wreck 8 years earlier where an older couple had died. He went to the cemetery to visit their graves. Their date of death was OCTOBER 1, 2001. (Luke was born in OCTOBER and he died in the year 2001.) Eden worked in a feed store in Soda Springs. As he was checking someone out at the register he said... "That will be 31.79". (Luke was born on the 31st, 1979 in Soda Springs, Idaho). Then Eden said..."Here's your change, 21 cents". (Luke died at the age of 21). Eden also loved to play the guitar, just like Luke.

All the memories of that October 1979 came flooding back and brought Robin and I to tears. As we watched that movie with the name of Luke's birthplace in the title, with Luke's middle name, with Luke's year of death, with Luke's month of birth, with Luke's day of birth, with Luke's year of birth, with Luke's age at death, we knew that a wonderful gift had been delivered right into our living room. After all those years since Luke's birth, and after all those years since Luke's death, we were graced with the knowing that he had finally made it back to Soda Springs..... all the way from his Heavenly home.

2012 Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001










THE VACATION

We drove down from the mountain top
To another place and time,
The town where he took his first breath
In nineteen seventy nine.

We walked the streets of Soda Springs
And thought about his smile.
We saw the place where he was born
And we cried there for awhile.

We watched the geyser touch the sky
As drops of sadness touched the ground.
We searched the town of Soda Springs
Where hidden memories could be found.

The playground's baby swing hung still,
So we gave it a gentle push.
We thought we heard him giggle
Even though his voice is hushed.

We Passed the house where we all lived
When he was a baby boy.
Recalling special moments
That will forever bring us joy.

We went out to the little park
Where he used to laugh and play.
We stood there on the covered bridge
And watched his ashes float away.

What a bittersweet vacation
Stepping back into the past.
Reliving the beginnings of.....
A life that didn't last.

2017 - Christine Ross
In memory of Lucas Christopher Ross
Born October 31, 1979 Soda Springs, Idaho
Died April 3, 2001 Cave Creek, Arizona
21 Acute Bronchopneumonia






THAT HOME OF LONG AGO


The front door had that same old squeak
As I entered that empty place.
The walls were bare, the furniture gone
And the sounds of life had ceased.

I was at that home of long ago
Where he took his final breath,
Hoping to find some memories
Or maybe something that was left.

I took a breath and inhaled deep
My lungs filled with musty air.
"Please take me back to yesterday."
I pleaded to God in a prayer.

I opened the door to his room,
There he was sitting on the floor,
Singing a song with a smile on his face,
Strumming away on that old guitar.

He looked up at me and nodded,
So I reached out to stroke his hair,
But just as I did everything that I saw
Faded away and disappeared.

I knew my prayer had been answered
So I got down on my knees
To say a prayer of thankfulness
For all that was given to me.

As I walked away from his room
I turned back for one last glance
And there he was with his hand held out
Saying... "May I have this dance?"

We danced across the bedroom floor
And we danced right down the hall.
Then he bowed and kissed my hand
And said..."I'm so glad you came to call."

I smiled at him as he said "Goodbye".
Then he turned and faded away,
But somehow in that moment of time
I returned to yesterday.

The front door squeaked when I closed it
As I left that "so-called" empty place
Where I found some long lost memories
From a life that never ceased.


2012 - Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001




MY BRINGER OF LIGHT

It was a bright beautiful day when I found out that I was pregnant with our second child. This was in the days when the sex of a child was usually only revealed at birth. Oh how I longed for a radiant little boy. I never told anyone, of my secret wish for a baby boy, except for the child growing inside me. My husband was not even aware of my wish. I dared not tell anyone in fear that it would not come true. So me and my little baby were the only ones in the world who knew.... and we talked about it all the time because deep within my soul, I just knew my baby was a little boy. We had a relationship that was sparked from the very beginning.

Months later after a very difficult delivery, the doctor handed our new little one to the nurse as I was asking my husband.... "A boy or a girl?" He looked at me with this glowing smile, and tears steaming down his face saying.... "It's our boy!" I then knew that he too had that same secret wish. Luke my little spook came into this world beaming at 2 pm on HALLOWEEN. It was a TRICK getting him here, but he sure was a TREAT.

I knew at the moment of his birth that he possessed a very special lustrous gift that was still to be known. As he grew I soon discovered that he had the gift of knowing how to love unconditionally. Luke and his big sister, Emily, had their usual sibling rivalry, but there was a glimmering bond between those two, like nothing I had ever witnessed.

Kindergarten revealed something even more special about my sweet little boy... he regarded his new found friends with the same blazing unconditional love that he had shown for his family. Throughout elementary school, Luke sought out the child who was maybe just a little different...handicapped, impaired, from another country, other race, being teased, lonely, or just someone in need a little ray of sunshine in their life. Luke became that sunshine.

Middle school brought many more friends, but Luke still pursued the kids that needed a little extra love. Our family trips sparkled when shared with Luke's exceptional friends. Many times we had an extra place set at the table for a kid that Luke had taken under his wings. He was always the light that led others out of the darkness of being different.

In High school Luke was an active member in a youth group and would illuminate our home with kids from all walks of life. I woke up one morning to eleven hungry high school boys who had been enlightened by Luke's unconditional love. Luke had a gift for seeing beyond how others defined these kids... by their piercings, hair color, unusual clothes, race, disabilities, lifestyle choice, or personal problems. Luke saw these friends as an opportunity to spread his light. And spread his light he did.

Age 21 produced even more radiance. At Luke's new job he befriended another special person. His new friend was partially paralyzed in one arm and had difficulty speaking because of cerebral palsy. Luke and he became the very best of friends. Most people could not understand this new friend when he spoke, but Luke could. Not only did Luke understand his words, Luke understood his heart. After Luke died, his friend confided in me how blessed he was to have had Luke in his life for only six short months, but that Luke's light would continue to warm his heart forever.

At Luke's service we had an open microphone, and his new friend bravely spoke to the crowd of friends and family that had gathered in the chapel. As his friend spoke most of the people in the chapel did not understand his words. But that didn't matter because the most important person in the chapel, Luke, understood his words just as he always did. As others also stood in front of the chapel and spoke, I noticed the soft light coming through the stained glass windows. I knew that my Bringer of Light was surrounding all of us with his warm and gentle light.

Luke always seemed to be looking towards Heaven as if absorbing its beacon. He brightened the lives of so very many in his short lifetime and he made a radiant difference to some who otherwise may still be wandering in the dark. There are a lot of people in this world today that are haloed with a special glow because of the spark that Luke ignited within their soul.

I found my Bringer of Light a very long time ago in 1979 and he brightened my world for 21 years. When he died I thought that his light had died with him. But he found me...... and he is still brightening my days even through my grief. I find that his sunshine can make me happy, and I also find that his sunshine can make me cry. But through the laughter or through the tears his sunshine always, always, always somehow finds me.

The name LUCAS means..... "BRINGER OF LIGHT". Luke was a shining example to his name and continues to honor the meaning of his name by being an eternal... "BRINGER OF LIGHT".

2011 Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001






I MISS HIM ALWAYS

I miss him as dawn is beginning to break,
When I awake to another day
And his memory is gently on my mind.

I miss him in the early morning breeze
When I catch a scent of pine trees
And breath in all the feelings that scent evokes.

I miss him in the mid day sunshine
When I see brightness all around me
And I smile remembering all of our times together.

I miss him in the afternoon quietness
When I hear a faint echo of laughter
And I laugh out loud just imagining it is him.

I miss him as the sun is beginning to set
When I feel the warmth that it provides
And I can feel the touch of his hug in that warmth.

I miss him at the close of the day
When the stars appear in the night sky
And I wonder how long it will be until I see him again.

I miss him in the middle of the night
When I awake from a dream of him
And I long to go back to sleep to dream of him once more.

I miss him as dawn is beginning to break,
When I awake to another day
And his memory is gently on my mind.

I miss him always.....

2011 - Christine Ross
In memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001







SPIRIT IN THE SKY

When I die and they lay me to rest
Gonna go to the place that's the best
When I lay me down to die
Goin' up to the spirit in the sky

Goin' up to the spirit in the sky
That's where I'm gonna go when I die
When I die and they lay me to rest
Gonna go to the place that's the best

Prepare yourself, you know it's a must
Gotta have a friend in Jesus
So you know that when you die
He's gonna recommend you to the spirit in the sky

Gonna recommend you to the spirit in the sky
That's where you're gonna go when you die
When you die and they lay you to rest
You're gonna go to the place that's the best

Never been a sinner, I never sinned
I got a friend in Jesus
So you know that when I die
He's gonna set me up with the spirit in the sky

Oh, set me up with the spirit in the sky
That's where I'm gonna go when I die
When I die and they lay me to rest
I'm gonna go to the place that's the best

Go to the place that's the best


~ Words & music by Norman Greenbaum



TRICK OR TREAT?

It was in the fall of 2000, and very close to Luke's 21st Halloween birthday. Luke was living at home with us for the very last time. He would soon be making his final journey in the Spring of 2001. It was such a pleasure to have him back home, if only for a little while. I had gone to the grocery store one October morning and saw in the ice cream section ice cream for dogs called Frosty Paws. So I just had to get some for our sweet little Basset Hound Blue. When I got home I unloaded the groceries. Luke and I and Blue Dog were the only ones home. I opened the box and gave one of the little vanilla cups of Frosty Paws to Blue. She absolutely loved it! I said...."Wow, that must really taste good." Luke said..."I wonder what it tastes like?" I said .... "I don't know, let's try it!" So Luke and I each got a spoon, scooped a little from one of the cups, and on the count of three we barely touched our tongues to it and it was absolutely HORRIBLE. But ol' Blue Dog sure did like it!

My husband Robin always liked to have a cup of vanilla ice cream after his dinner. It was almost time for Robin to get home from work so I said..."Hey Luke, lets tell dad we got him some ice cream and play a trick on him." (The only identification on the little cardboard cups was on the lids.) Luke said... "Okay, but you do it!" So I said..."Luke, now you just lay on the sofa like you are watching TV and don't give it away. Luke said... "Okay, no problem." It all seemed so appropriate since it was so close to Halloween.

Robin got home from work and we all had a nice dinner together. But during the dinner Luke and I were thinking of our plan to play a trick on Dad. I would look at Luke and he would get this silly grin on his face and I would just stretch my eyes wide in an attempt to silently tell him to not give away our secret!

After dinner we all went into the family room to watch some TV. After sitting there for a few minutes I said... "Hey Robin, would you like some desert?" Robin said..."Yes, what do you have?" I said..."Oh, I bought some little vanilla ice cream cups today." Robin said..."Yes, that sounds good!" So I went into the kitchen, got the little cup out of the freezer and removed the lid. By this time Luke was squirming on the couch, trying to hold in his laughter, so I gave Luke another "don't you laugh" look. Then I handed the cup of Frosty Paws to Luke's unsuspecting Dad. By this time, Luke was squirming even more, and his face was getting red, as he was trying so hard to conceal our secret. I glanced over at Luke with another one of my discerning looks. By then all Luke could do was to bury his head in the pillow, and then cover himself entirely up with the blanket. Next Robin stuck his spoon in the cup and scooped out a big ol' spoonful of what he thought was delicious vanilla ice cream and popped it into his mouth. He immediately got up and ran to the kitchen sink spitting it out of his mouth while saying... "What the Hell is this stuff?" Well by that time Luke and I were laughing uncontrollably. Luke was laughing so hard that he fell off of the sofa, but continued to laugh while rolling on the floor. He gave true meaning to ROFLMAO! His laughter from that day still echos through my heart and my soul and my mind.

That was so long ago, but to this day every time I see Frosty Paws in the freezer section of the grocery store I smile and sometimes I even laugh out loud. I can always feel Luke laughing with me from his new home that is in the 'place that's the best'. This little event in our live's is the tale of an October 'TRICK', and it will forever be there in the corners of my mind delivering a wonderful memory that arrives at unexpected times, warming my heart with a very special .....'TREAT'.

2013 Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001



ANNIVERSARY AND BIRTHDAY DEDICATIONS
(from the 2015 Bringer of Light Newsletter)


IN MEMORY OF
Adam R. Fiock
26
July 1, 1981- October 6, 2007
Self inflicted, GSWH
SUBMITTED BY
Christine, Adam's m<3m

Dearest Adam.

I wish I was not at the library typing this so I could cry. I can't believe it will be 8 years. Everything seems to be not real.

I love you always.

Love forever, M<3M


IN MEMORY OF
Amanda Nicole Curcio
17
Oct. 17, 1989 - May 19, 2007
suicide by hanging


IN MEMORY OF
Ashleigh Love
19
09 17 90 - 10 06 09


IN MEMORY OF
Barry Atken
20 years
10 10 84 - 3 12 04
suicide


IN MEMORY OF
Brendan Stump
17


IN MEMORY OF
BRYAN DANIEL WOLFE
27 YEARS, 6 MONTHS
APRIL 14TH, 1978 - OCTOBER 22nd, 2005
MURDER


IN MEMORY OF
Cara Lee Parks Buras
30
9/9/1976 - 10/30/2006
Official Cause Accident


IN MEMORY OF
Chad Eric Day
30
B - 10-17-72 D - 8-15-03
Seizure


IN MEMORY OF
Craig M Copsey
28
DOB 6-2-1980 DOD 10-8-2008
MURDERED


IN MEMORY OF
Douglas Klein
37
4/9/74 - 10/11/11
Gunshot Right Temple


IN MEMORY OF
ELIZABETH LUTO
27 years 10 months
9 Dec 1973 - 25 Oct 2001
pulmonary embolism
3 wks after successful open heart surgery


IN MEMORY OF
Grace Nicole Miceli
20
October 27 th, 1984 - June 8 th, 2005
Accident


IN MEMORY OF
Jamie Vitello
24
10 22 79 - 04 28 04
Cancer


IN MEMORY OF
Jason Beau Morgan
23
07/31/1979/ 10/10/2002
Aneurysm
SUBMITTED BY
Diane Morgan, Beau's Mom

Beau, I cannot believe it has been 13 years since you have passed on to the other side. I love and miss you more than ever. I miss so many things but one of the things I miss most is when we danced. You always remember to ask me to dance during special occasions. Oh, how I loved to dance with you during these times. I hope you are dancing in Heaven (I know you are), and when I meet you at Heaven's Door, I want us to dance. You will always be in my heart and soul.

"I HOPE YOU DANCE!"

Love, Mom


IN MEMORY OF
Jeffrey Michael Felix
27 years old
10-03-77 - 12-30-04
Malignant Melanoma


IN MEMORY OF
Jennifer DeGeneres
42
October 16, 1969 - June 22, 2012
Complications of Lupus

In the arms of an angel......


IN MEMORY OF
Jimmy Stokes
21
October 30, 1979 - March 2, 2001
Accidental Overdose of Oxycontin


IN MEMORY OF
Jonathan Steven Witty
16
10-24-85 6-7-2002
car accident


IN MEMORY OF
Joshua Scott Johnson
21
October 11,1985-April 1,2007
Accedental Drug Overdose
SUBMITTED BY
Josh's Mom

Happy Heavenly Birthday!! You would be turning 30 this year I cannot help but wonder who and what you would be today, if you would be married? or have a child? that I could call my grandbaby, if not that would be ok too just to have you here. I will forever miss you Josh hope you have the best birthday ever.

Love you Mom


IN MEMORY OF
Joshua Tackett
15


IN MEMORY OF
LCpl USMC Justin Linscott
18 years old
October 23. 1990 - July 11, 2009
Related to an auto accident (official)


IN MEMORY OF
Kenneth Michael Naturale
25 yrs
10/10/80 - 12/16/05


IN MEMORY OF
Laura Ann Kimble
33
11/5/68 - 10/19/02
Complications of non-malignant brain tumor


IN MEMORY OF
Lauren Niederer
16
10/12/87 - 05/5/04
Suicide


IN MEMORY OF
Laurie Michelle Baer
16
10-31-76 / 12-4-92
congenital heart defect


IN MEMORY OF
Leon Jr. Jonas
29
2/17/61 10/26/90
car crash


IN MEMORY OF
Lucas Christopher Ross "Luke"
21
October 31, 1979 - April 3, 2001
Acute Bronchopneumonia
SUBMITTED BY
Robin Ross, Luke's Dad

LUKE,

I keep saying every year how much I miss you, and how much it hurts. Not only are the words the same, but the feelings, the pain, the emptiness and the missing you remains the same, after all of these years.

Even though I have learned that you are OK and I will see you again when it is my time to join you, the pain of being here without you never stops. Sometimes the pain comes on slowly and other times it hits all of sudden and completely overpowers me. The last few weeks have been especially hard, when I see the injustice of people still here, and you are not. Why do they get to stay, why did you have to go so soon, so young, so good.

Thank you for staying close to us, we all need you.

I miss you LUKE,

Love Dad


IN MEMORY OF
Michael D. Carico II
39
10/27/1963 - 11/27/2002
Killed by a red light runner


IN MEMORY OF
Michael Schrimpscher
19
10 23 89 - 05 14 09


IN MEMORY OF
Rob Northrop aka RadRob
26 years young
October 28, 1971 - December 23, 1997
Leukemia


IN MEMORY OF
Robert Travis Miller
19 yrs and 10 mths and 10 days
11/29/1991 to 10/09/2011
murder~ shot in the back


IN MEMORY OF
Roseann Martinez
36 years
12-31-1972 to 10-6-2009
organ failure


IN MEMORY OF
Samantha Myers
3 months 13 days old
Jul. 4, 1999 - Oct. 17, 1999
Heart Condition


IN MEMORY OF
Seth Bowden Tidball
19
10/4/89 - 02/24/09
Suicide
SUBMITTED BY
Seth's Mom Bowden Tidball

My Dear Son

It is your earthly birthday Sunday and just as lonely as the other 6 that have come and gone. I know that you celebrate with us but that does not take the want away of wanting you physically here with me. I do the best I can to honor you in my daily life by doing what I must every day. I hope you are proud of me. I would give anything to see you again. I often sit and wonder what you would look like at 26. Would you be married, have children? I don't know.

Be looking for your annual balloon release Sunday! I love you to the moon and back!! Until I see you again, I love you with all that I am.

Love always, Mom


IN MEMORY OF
Shannon David Burns
33
1/2/1976 - 10/30/2009
Blunt force trauma to the head from a fall at work


IN MEMORY OF
SHELLY LYNN BEAM
32
10/03/1975--03/26/2008
drug overdose


IN MEMORY OF
Susan Ann Lansing
25 yrs.
11-07-57 - 10-26-83
Auto Accident


IN MEMORY OF
Tracy Lee Cox
30
10/18/1974 - 11/28/2004
Suicide - Gunshot


IN MEMORY OF
Wayne Jonas
28
8-19-62 / 10-26-90
car crash






SEE OUR CHILDREN'S NAMES

(no more names can be added)



PAGE 01 ~ POETRY, STORIES, QUOTES, PAINTINGS, AND MORE



PAGE 02 ~ OUR CHILDREN'S NAMES ~ BABIES AND CHILDREN



PAGE 03 ~ OUR CHILDREN'S NAMES ~ TEENAGERS



PAGE 04 ~ OUR CHILDREN'S NAMES ~ TWENTIES



PAGE 05 ~ OUR CHILDREN'S NAMES ~ THIRTY AND OLDER






"VISIT WITH LUKE"

Last Entry in Luke's Journal:

"When there is love in my heart and a smile on my face,
I need nothing else." ~ Luke Ross

"MAY THE FORCE BE WITH YOU"

Music playing:
MOONLIGHT