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One of the gifts we gave Luke for his very last Christmas was a dark gray bath robe. I vividly remember as he opened it he got a big smile on his face, and as he stood up and put it on over his clothes he said..."Oh man... this is warm." He absolutely loved that robe. Some of my fondest memories are of him walking across the living room in the early morning wearing that robe as he yawned and stretched just before sitting at the kitchen bar talking with me while I made him an omelet or French toast.

One day, just before our first Christmas without Luke I was cleaning around Luke's case that contained all of his special things and where his urn rested on top. His Christmas robe that he loved so much was solemnly hanging there on the hook, where it had hung since his death that April. I put my hands around that robe and clenched it tight as I brought it to my face to take in Luke's scent. But the only aroma I inhaled was the musty smell of dust. His scent had vanished just as his body had vanished 8 months earlier.

As I stood there my mind overflowed with thoughts of life and thoughts of death. I thought about how I had reach into the pockets of this abandoned robe many times hoping to find some long-lost treasure and being disappointed that nothing was ever found except the emptiness within those pockets and the emptiness within my heart. But just for old time's sake I reached in just once more and much to my surprise, there was something in one of the pockets! My heart skipped a beat with anticipation of finding a treasure that I had maybe, somehow overlooked all those other times in the past eight months. I clinched my hand around it and slowly pulled that long-awaited item from that robe pocket. My heart was thumping hard, I had a lump in my throat, I could feel tears at the edge of my eyelids waiting to spill forth, and I was on the verge of gasping for air. I slowly opened my clenched hand and there it was, something that I had not expected to find ................... a dead moth! I fell to the floor as the tears spilled over the edge of my eyelids to my face. Then a disturbing thought entered my mind......"My Luke has been gone long enough for an insect to take up residence and die in his deserted robe pocket." The scene that followed is one that is probably very familiar to any grieving parent. I cursed the moth, I cursed death, I cursed life, and I cursed the pain. As I laid there on the floor crying and screaming, my mind filled with the awful memories of that horrible day that my only son died.

After some time had passed I felt a warmth on my face. I looked up and it was the light coming through the window, shining on me. I pulled myself from the floor and walked to the window. I looked out through the frigid glass at the snow and the bright blue sky and the all beauty that surrounded me as I encountered the warmth of that Heavenly light. With tears streaming down my face I felt as if I were peering directly into Heaven. There I was, trapped alone in my new life on the side of the glass filled with pain and sorrow and lonliness. But I soon realized that just beyond the glass was another life awaiting me with freedom, and beauty, and hope, and happiness. I knew in time I would be in that wonderful place where my son was. My thoughts drifted from the horror of his death to the beauty of his Heaven. As I stood there engulfed in my reality, I heard a fluttering noise between the curtain and the window. I looked and there it was, a moth looking for its freedom, trying to get to the other side of that glass. I knew there were certain types of moths that could survive the cold of Winter, but I could not recall ever seeing one. I clutched the moth in my hands and walked out to the front porch as I felt the moth's wings flapping against my palms. I stood on the edge of the steps of the cabin and opened my gently clutched hands and released this moth to the freedom that it had earned. I watched it fly away and soon could no longer see it, just as I could no longer see Luke. But I knew, at that very moment, my son had also found freedom and beauty and another life that he too had earned..... somewhere in the bright blue skies of Christmas.

2014 Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001


She stood alone at the window
Just staring out through the glass.
It was early Christmas morning.
She waiting for time to pass.

The house was quite and lonely.
Everyone else was sound to sleep.
I wondered what she was thinking
As her sad eyes began to weep.

A faint light in the distance
Shone down on the window pane
Casting a soft reflection of her
In the room where I quietly remained.

I stood back in the darkness
Hiding as I was looking on
Wanting to reach out and hold her
To let her know she wasn't alone.

She must have sensed that I was there
Because she slowly turned around.
But just as she did I stepped aside
Not making the slightest sound.

She whispered my name into the night
So I whispered into her ear.....
"Mom, I'm right here by your side,
Your angel is always near."

2007 - Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001

Find and be found to discover your.....
The name LUCAS means Bringer of Light


Charles Brown was a Texas Blues musician who recorded "Please Come Home For Christmas", a very melancholy Christmas song. It is about loosing someone and finding yourself unbearably lonely over the holidays. It includes a number of characteristics of Christmas music, such as multiple references in the lyrics to the Christmas season and Christmas traditions, and the use of a Church bell type sound, created using a piano, at the start of the song. It is sometimes referred to as "Bells Will Be Ringing", which are the first four words of the song. Brown wrote it with Gene Redd, who was a New York producer. Many artists have covered this song, with the Eagles taking it to #18 in the US in 1978.

(see a special presentation of this song in the NEWS SECTION, near the end of the newsletter)



Bells will be ringing the sad, sad news
Oh what a Christmas to have the blues
My baby's gone, I have no friends
To wish me greetings once again

Choirs will be singin' 'Silent Night'
Christmas carols by candlelight
Please come home for Christmas
Please come home for Christmas
If not for Christmas by New Year's night

Friends and relations send salutations
Sure as the stars shine above
But this is Christmas, yes Christmas my dear
It's the time of year to be with the one you love

So won't you tell me you'll never more roam?
Christmas and New Year will find you home
There'll be no more sorrow, no grief and pain
And I'll be happy, happy once again

Ooh, there'll be no more sorrow, no grief and pain
And I'll be happy Christmas once again






Danny Stewart 29 ~ Denise McCormick 40 ~ Derek Wentz 36 ~ Elizabeth Lutto 27 ~ Javon Watkins 23 ~ Jeremy Hughes 26 ~ Jerry Giles 35 ~ Kristi Davis 24 ~ Lindsay Braashier 18 ~ Mindy Clark 22 ~ Oran Jones 19 ~ Paul LaFaver 27 ~ Roseann Martinez 36 ~


Alex Saladino 4 ~ Andrienne Ingram 28 ~ Brent Legault 23 ~ Craig Watson 21 ~ Chrissie Carrigan 15 ~ Damon Daugherty 23 ~ Daniel Quinn 21 ~ Danny Sherril 15 ~ Denise Vaughan 6 ~ Dennis Murphy 28 ~ Jeffery Felix 27 ~ Jeremy Hughes 26 ~ Jerry Giles 35 ~ John Gabriel 32 ~ Kenneth Naturale 25 ~ Laurie Baer 16 ~ Marisa Ward 25 ~ Patti Rawls 54 ~ Rob Northrop 26 ~ Stephen Wilson 20 ~ Timothy Stratton 29 ~ TJ Smith 20 ~ Trenton Dove 31 ~ Troy Mitzlaff 37 ~

IN MEMORY OF: Laurie Michelle Baer
AGE: 16
DATES: 10-31-76; 12-4-92
CAUSE: congenital heart defect
SUBMITTED BY: Shirley, Lauries Mommy

The happiest day of my life was when the nurse brought her into my room after she was born. I couldn't believe I had such a beautiful baby girl, something I had always wanted since I was a very little girl, someone to be with me always, to love and love me. Then the saddest day at six weeks when we were told of her heart defect. Then happy again in June of 1990 when we were told she could be helped. Then ecstatic on December 3, 1992 when we were told that her heart wasn't as bad as we had always been told, that they could not only help her, but make it function like mine or yours. Then life ended the next day when she died.

AGE: 29
DATES: FEBRUARY 6, 1979 / DECEMBER 7, 2008
CAUSE: pancreatitis

You are near me, even if I don't see you. You are with me, even if you are far away. You are in my heart, in my thoughts, in my life ALWAYS!

We love you and miss you terribly, Tim.

IN MEMORY OF: Alexander Zachary Matthew Saladino
AGE: 4 1/2
DATES: 04/20/1996 - 12/31/2000
CAUSE: Medical Malpractice
SUBMITTED BY: Sue Saladino, Alex' Mom

The Christmas Stocking

There is an empty stocking,
Hanging on my fireplace.
And it brings an empty feeling,
That time cannot erase.

No candy in this stocking,
No presents 'neath the tree.
No more gifts he made at school,
Especially for me.

Empty chair at the table,
In his room, an empty bed.
No more lists to Santa Claus,
Or stories to be read.

Decorations on a grave,
A pretty Christmas wreath.
Carefully brushing snow away,
From the headstone underneath.

Not long ago things weren't like this,
This season held such joy.
Then tragedy stepped in and took,
My precious little boy.

I hide my feelings from my friends,
But, I cannot disguise,
There's nothing I would rather see,
Than Christmas through my child's eyes.

Sue Saladino 12/7/2002
~ in memory of Alex

IN MEMORY OF: Daniel "Danny" James Stewart
AGE: 29
DATES: December 23, 1979 - July 20, 2009
CAUSE: Accidental Drug Overdose


In the wee hours of the morning of December 23, 1979, I quickly announced to your dad that my contractions were very rapid, and said that we needed to get to the hospital soon. I told your dad that there was no time for coffee and donuts after his request to stop at 7-11.

We got to the hospital in 15 minutes, and I was wheeled in to the maternity section of the hospital rapidly.

I was put on a gurney, and went into the labor room. Your dad turned on a skit on TV of Saturday Night Live, and I was holding a picture of Jesus, praying as my contractions became very strong.

The nurse rushed in the room and checked me, and told us that you were well on your way !!!! Before I knew it seconds flew by and 1, 2, 3 you almost flew out !!!!

The nurse said "You have a beautiful baby boy," and I was so excited and was in awe of your first breath and cry. My first words were "Praise the Lord." " Praise the Lord !" You weighed in at 8 lbs, 2 oz. and you were 21 inches long.

I held you and immediately nursed you.

I'll never forget that magical moment.

Danny's mom,


Make a dedication to your child for their anniversary and birthday.



Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful. ~Norman Vincent Peale


Our worst nightmare came true, except this pain is worse than we imagined ~ Rhonda Ross 2011


IN MEMORY OF: Daniel Scott Forrester
AGE: 30
DATES: 2/28/70 ~ 1/10/2001
CAUSE: non-hodgkins lymphoma
SUBMITTED BY: Arlene (Danny's Mom)



Share a quote related to grief.


IN MEMORY OF: Crawford Alan Carnahan
AGE: 18
DATES: August 21, 1988 ~ May 11, 2007
CAUSE: Leptospirosis
SUBMITTED BY: Alan Carnahan ~ Dad

"Time" doesn't change how I feel about you, Crawford. But, it does cloud my memories of you, though. I find myself remembering a memory that I hadn't thought of for awhile. It brings happiness and sadness at the same time. I love to hear from other people that remember you and who can tell me stories of you that I hadn't heard before or retell stories that I had forgotten.

"Time" causes my skin to wrinkle and sag as I grow older; but, my memory of your face never has you growing older. Through "time"; I find that the overwhelming grief that I once had after your death, is now just a bellow from a hole in my heart. Once upon a "time", I cried so hard that I thought that I were going to die myself. "Time" has made me cry less; but, the crying is never over. A mention of your name, an image of you, a remembrance of something that you did; or just the mere thought of you brings tears.

Death has robbed me of our "time" together. "Time" spent with you as a family. "Time" is forever passing me as I grow older. I want that "time" back in the worst of ways. I wished that I had "time" to say my goodbyes to you.

I will never be able to get that "time" back with you,son...Until...IT IS MY "TIME".

Written by a grieving father to his only child.
Miss you and love you more than my words will ever express...


Write a letter to your child in Heaven.


IN MEMORY OF: Laurie Michelle Baer
AGE: 16
DATES: 10-31-76; 12-4-92
CAUSE: congenital heart defect
SUBMITTED BY: Shirley, Lauries Mommy

Laurie, my only child, died at 16 years of age during "corrective" heart surgery in Boston on December 4, 1992. She was born with a heart defect, pulmonary stenosis, two right sided lungs, a single ventricle, and a single AV valve. There was no surgery that could be done to divide her ventricle into two. We were not told that a surgery was available for her condition by her doctor until June of 1990, that if we "had asked four years earlier" it could have been done in Galveston. By the time we were finally referred to Boston two years later, the procedure "wasn't right" for her. But, according to them, she didn't need this procedure because "she had two ventricles, not one" which we had been told for 16 years. They could close the wall in the ventricle, makes two valves out of the one, and she would be "as good as new", that she would be "running the malls in two weeks", and they gave us a drawing of exactly what her heart looked like and what they would do.

The next day, after four hours in surgery, the nurse came and told us all the repairs had gone well, that they were closing her up and preparing to take her to PICU. We were so happy! Then one hour later she came and told us that they were having problems, that they had to go back in and replace the valve that they had split into two. Then one hour later she came to tell us the surgeon was worried, so it was time for us to worry. Thirty minutes later the surgeon came and told us she was stable, that they had shocked her heart 26 times to get it into rhythm and they were sending her to PICU. Then he told us her heart was REALLY BAD (the night before he told us it WASN'T THAT BAD), that he had to remove an obstruction in her ventricle (which he didn't tell us about the night before, or draw on the diagram of the surgery he did for us). When we asked him if he knew about it after the catheterization and when he was discussing the surgery with us, he said he did, but when we asked why he didn't tell us about it, he just got up and said "surgery had to be done some time", then left. Five minutes later an intern came in and told us that she had had another episode of arrhythmia and died (she had a six year history of arrhythmia and was taking medications for it, but the surgeon insisted that she didn't have a rhythm problem and that it would not be a problem during surgery). I don't have to tell you how we felt. All I could say was "I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do."

I went to see her in the O.R. after she died--it was awful! They had her all wrapped up in a white sheet like a mummy. I almost fainted, my knees gave out. I went to her, held her in my arms and cried that I didn't know they were going to do that to her, then took the rubber band out of her long brown hair and put it in my wallet. Then we were asked to leave the hospital. We told them we would like to stay in the lobby for a while because her body couldn't be sent home until Sunday and we didn't want to be far away from her until we left the next morning. They told us it was against hospital policy for us to stay in the lobby. The nurse escorted my husband up to where our things were, stopped to pick me up on the third floor, called a taxi and walked us out the front door!

It wasn't bad enough that we took her 1500 miles away from home to the "best" doctors, but to have her die away from home like that was devastating. If they had only told us everything the night before when we gave our consent, that the risk was probably much higher than we would have taken at that time, we probably would have taken her home for Christmas and let her have her first real tree, then brought her back in a couple of months. They just decided to take her life and ruin our lives by making the decision for us! We talked to many lawyers after this, but they all agreed that we could never get another doctor to testify against this surgeon because he was so well known. One lawyer had tried before for another client. Another lawyer we called told us the name of the surgeon before we could even finish our story!

Laurie had just passed her driver's test and was waiting for her license. It didn't come until after she died. It was waiting for us in the mail when we got home. We put it in her coffin with her. She never got to see it. She was all excited about being in Boston because we heard on the radio that it was going to snow. It didn't snow until after she died, while we were waiting in the airport all night long until our flight the next day. She never got to ride "first class" in an airplane. We rode in "first class" because I was crying so much the stewardess put us up there in an unused seat. Laurie came home in the cargo hold of the plane.

For a long time after she died, I couldn't even look at her picture. I felt so guilty for what I had done to her. I couldn't even go to the cemetery until a week after she was buried. For years after I was told of her heart condition I had nightmares of seeing her in a coffin. So my best friend and my boss viewed her body and took the clothes and things to put in it for me. They said that she looked "beautiful". I regret not having them cut some of her long hair for me to keep forever. We had a closed casket funeral.

Share the story of your child's life, birth, death (any or all of these).


IN MEMORY OF: Joey Marshall Whiteman
AGE: 21 years, 360 days
DATES: 9/8/80-9/3/02
CAUSE: Auto accident/pierced aoreta
SUBMITTED BY: Terrie (Joey's Mom)

Dear Mommy

Look outside it's snowing
Oh Mommy can we play?
Can we build a snowman
Can we sled all day?

Will you help us make it?
Will Daddy help us too
Oh, do I love Christmas
And I know that you do too

Santa Claus is coming
Bringing gifts our way
Hanging stockings by the fire
On this Our Christmas Day.

Love, Your Son Joey

Share a poem about your child or about grief.


IN MEMORY OF: Adam R. Fiock
AGE: 26
DATES: 7-1-81. 10-6-2007
CAUSE: Self inflicted wound to head
SUBMITTED BY: Christine Knapp, Adam's proud mom of a soldier.


Last night I was watching the "Next Food Truck Race", on the Food network channel.

I was really struggling. One of the contestants secured a parking place on South Congress, my street address.

I could not believe it. 3 times they showed the steet sign, South Congress Avenue. My whole sreet address.

Unbelievable Adam. YOU Rock.
I love you,

Share a sign from your child.


written or said by our children

IN MEMORY OF: Jason Beau Morgan
AGE: 23
DATES: July 31, 1979 and October 10, 2002
CAUSE: aneurysm
SUBMITTED BY: Diane Morgan

I want to share this poem in dedication to my sons, Beau who is in Heaven and Brad who is in Cleveland, Ohio. Beau wrote this poem and Brad did the background design, which I regret does not show. Beau was a funny guy, so this poem has some humor in it. He loved Christmas and loved giving gifts. Beau and Brad did this for December 2001, less than a year before Beau's death. Also, they did a portrait of themselves in which they gave as gifts, which I think is very AMAZING, since this was the year of Luke's (Christine's son) passing to the light, and less than a year before Beau did. Beau and Luke, The Good Ol' Boys!

I love you so much, Beau! and miss you terribly during Christmas as it was your favorite time of year. Please know that you will be in my heart and soul, and I know you will be here as your BRO,' Brad is coming home for Christmas!


Number one came on July 31, long and lanky he came out with a burst.

He cried and screamed his parents named him Beau, big hands and feet look at him with his fro.

Number two was born on September the first day, independent and sensitive as he lay.

As he cried and screamed mom and dad named Brad; smiled and all, no one would ever thought he would be bad.

Together they grew so big and so tall; in high school they played the sports of soccer and basketball.

They both attended Catholic High of Pointe Coupee, now they're in college at ULM, can you believe?

Both boys know they are so fine, the ladies in Louisiana all think there are divine as wine.

In the city and county is were they're living, can you see? They used the bathroom and went outside when they had to pee.

Their parents, with hearts of gold, raised them to be men; they never thought they would miss T.V. dinners in the den.

Their family would always be in their hearts as number one, look at Beau and Brad laughing having so much fun.

Dad works shift work all night and all day; look at his hair, oh no! The boys made it turn gray.

Mom goes to work and school all day as she must, she stays home and works in the book of calculus.

Mom and Dad we thank you for our lives, we love you so much, we will never forget anything, not even a single touch.

Look out world, here they come, they're not naughty but nice. The Morgan brothers will not do it once but twice.

Written by: Jason Beau Morgan
Designed by: Bradley James Morgan

Share anything written or spoken by your child.


IN MEMORY OF: Patti Rawls
AGE: 54
DATES: 3/2/56 -12/11/2011
CAUSE: Melanoma
SUBMITTED BY: Mother, Helen Wallace

Patti has been gone for 4 years on December 11 and as I think about that I think of the first 4 years of her life. She was such a pretty blonde haired blue eyed baby. Her Dad and I were so in love with her and couldn't get enough of just looking at her. She could be sleeping and we would be just watching her and waiting for her to wake up. Since first babies don't come with a manual we made many mistakes, the first one was the rocking chair. I would love to rock her but when she would be asleep (I thought) and I put her down those blue eyes would fly open. I soon found out that even though I loved rocking her, she didn't know she was supposed to stay asleep when I put her to bed. We just loved every phase she reached, seeing her hands and playing with her feet and of course the first steps. She was already spoiled so when the "terrible twos" came along she was already ahead of schedule. When she was about 3 she had a baby brother and she loved him so much and always took up for him even until the day she died. She thought her brother could do no wrong even though they had their disagreements. She might pick on him but for everyone else it was hands off. One specific thing I remember about her 4th year was a haircut I gave her. I was cutting her bangs and was standing behind her and oh my goodness that was not the right place to stand as the bangs were way too short and kind of stood out straight. She reminded me of that haircut all her life. She was still pretty even though her hair was pathetic, and of course it finally grew out and after that her haircuts were better. Her first four years were such good years, they were "the good old days". These last four years have been very lonesome without her. I know she is no longer in pain so I can bear it knowing that one day I will see her again and that will be a glorious day.

Share a special memory of your child at any age.


IN MEMORY OF: Joey Marshall Whiteman
AGE: 21 years, 360 days
DATES: 9/8/80-9/3/02
CAUSE: Auto accident/pierced aoreta
SUBMITTED BY: Terrie (Joey's Mom)

I had a dream the other night.

In the 12 years that Joey is gone, I've never seen his face, body, and he never talked in the dream.

This was a first, he talked to me about having a party in the house with all the friends he brought with him.

I'd say they were Angels because no one looked familiar.

To me that was the blessing that he came and looked exactly like he did right before he died.

Share a dream that you or someone had of your child.


IN MEMORY OF: Christian Victoria (Chrissie) Carrigan
AGE: 15 yrs. 22 days
DATES: 11-14-1986 to 12-06-2001
CAUSE: suicide
SUBMITTED BY: Kathie, Mom of Chrissie

Trevia & Peter (Chrissie's older sister) took Chrissie to Disney as a golden birthday gift to her in 2000. Trevia and Chrissie were camping on Disney resort. They were sitting eating toasted marshmallows when an armadillo ran thru the camp site. Chrissie jumped up and screamed and ran to the van and climbed in locking the doors. Chrissie just kept screaming she was not coming out and sleep in the tent with rats running around that size. Took her sister almost an hour to convince her that it was not a rat. I do not think Chrissie ever got over that.


Share a funny memory of your child at any age.


IN MEMORY OF: Joshua Eugene Hedglin
AGE: 18
DATES: 9/13/78~3/16/97
WRITTEN BY: Monika Hedglin

The mind understands what the heart can't accept.
It is 1 am the house is quite, Doc is asleep.
The house is decorated the tree is in the corner,
It is glowing bright, your star is at the top of the tree.
I am listening for your car to come down the street,
Waiting for my grandkids to come bursting thru the door.

The mind understands what the heart can't accept.
17 Christmas' I have waited hoped and listened.
While keeping my secret wish tucked safely inside my heart.
Will this be the year?my heart gives a leap and fills with Joy.

The mind understands what the heart can't accept.
Another year slips silently by, no wishes fulfilled.
Your spending your Christmas with Jesus again this year.
Its ok son I can only imagine the Christmas you'll celebrate,
With your angel friends and Jesus it must be awesome.

The mind understands what the heart can't accept.
Maybe someday the heart will accept what the mind understands.

by mm2j4vr (c)

Love Monika
Josh's Mom May Our Angel Joshua Light your way with all the brightness of that first Christmas Star.
May his Angel Dust remind you of all the Love and Beauty in this world if only we would look with our hearts.

Share anything that makes you proud of your child.



IN MEMORY OF: Laurie Michelle Baer
AGE: 16
DATES: 10-31-76; 12-4-92
CAUSE: congenital heart defect
SUBMITTED BY: Shirley, Lauries Mommy

On her grave marker, we have Jesus with children and pets on the left side, and on the right side the last verse of the poem that was used at her funeral - I don't know who wrote it but it went like this:

"Her golden heart stopped beating.
A determined spirit was at rest.
God broke our hearts to prove to us
He only takes the best."

Share any way that you have memorialized your child.


Does your child communicate with you from the other side? Explain
(see the news section and/or the submission page
for list of questions)

IN MEMORY OF: Jason Christopher Dunn
AGE: 22
DATES: June 5 1974-March 13 1997
CAUSE: Accidental Gun Shot
SUBMITTED BY: Susie-Jason's Mom

One morning I was really feeling down..
I was still driving school bus then..
and I was talking to Jason and I told him
I really needed a hug..
I felt my elbow move inward..
like someone reached around
me and hugged me...
I said to myself..that
has got to be my imagination..
just at that moment I felt it again and
heard "Imagine That"
I love that boy.

Share your answer to one of the questions about grief.
(See list of questions in the NEWS section and/or the SUBMISSIONS page.


IN MEMORY OF: Daniel Scott Forrester
AGE: 30
DATES: 2/28/70 ~ 1/10/2001
CAUSE: non-hodgkins lymphoma
SUBMITTED BY: Arlene (Danny's Mom)

I'm grateful that my faith in God and His word, is strong.

Share how you have been blessed at anytime in your life.



IN MEMORY OF: Adam R. Fiock
AGE: 26
DATES: 7-1-81 10-6-2007
CAUSE: Self inflicted GSWH
SUBMITTED BY: Christine Adam's M♡M

Dear Christine,

First, thank you for mentioning Veteran's Day and the military names.

When reading about your family and trips, etc., I realize how dysfunctional my childhood was, and then my children's family life was not healthy no matter how hard I tried.

Luke is very lucky to have you; all of us are too. You make it easier to cope. I hope you had peace yesterday on Luke's birthday.

Christine,Adam's proud m♡m of a soldier.

IN MEMORY OF: Christopher Ronald Faller
AGE: 7-1/2 years
DATES: May 7, 1990 - March 24, 1998
CAUSE: viral tumors after successful piggyback heart transplant
SUBMITTED BY: Maria, Christopher's Mommy

Dear Christine - as usual, reading your newsletter brought me to tears. I guess they are "good tears" though, as I was also smiling through my tears. the image of your son Luke crashing to the floor in the restaurant with the straws attached to his head and face, was just priceless. thank you for sharing that with us. it helps to remember some of the lighter moments, that is for sure. As always, thank you for sharing all the memories with us, good and bad. it just helps so much to be able to read other parents' stories, and know that we are not alone on this grief journey.

love and hugs,
Christopher's mommy forever

IN MEMORY OF: Joey Whiteman
AGE: 21 yrs. 360 days
DATES: September 8, 1980 - September 3, 2002
CAUSE: Auto Accident

One of the Best Newsletters you have ever written, I would like to know who pays you to make me cry and on the first few seconds.

Of course you know too, that I love Josh Groban and to hear "The Prayer", made me almost collapse.

I could just hear the angels laughing as he read your story out loud. I loved the mac & cheese story and the room no one is allowed to enter or touch, I laughed so hard.

Love you my sweet,


Make a comment about somthing in this month's newsletter.


You may make a submission for any section and for any month up to a year in advance. Please see the chart on the submission page for availabilty.

Number of Bringer of Light Newsletter Subscribers: 383



1. What do you think Heaven is like?

2. Based on your personal experience what would you say to someone that has just lost their child and what hope could you give them?

3. How long has your child been gone physically and how long does it seem like your child has been gone? Explain

4. Do you feel as if your child has been forgotten by some family members and friends? Explain

5. Do you think our children that have died miss us? Explain

6. How has the death of your child changed you?

7. If you could choose to relive any day that you spent with your child, what day would you choose and why?

8. How would you define the grief that is felt with the loss of a child?

9. How has your life changed between the day your child died and now?

10. Does your child communicate with you from the other side? Explain


If you have ever made a submission to the Bringer of Light Newsletter or if you have provided your child's information, your child's name should appear at the top of the Dedications Section when it is their anniversary or birthday. If you have not provided your child's information you may do so by replying to the BRINGER OF LIGHT NEWSLETTER email (please type INFORMATION in the subject line). You may also write a dedication to be included below the section names for your child's special dates.


Performed by the Eagles

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Special thanks for Bringer of Light Newsletter submissions this month:

Shirley, Laurie's Mommy
Melissa Stratton
Sue Saladino, Alex's Mom
Sue Kromer
Rhonda Ross
Arlene, Danny's Mom
Alan Carnahan, Crawford's Dad
Terrie, Joey's Mom
Christine Knapp, Adam's proud mom of a soldier
Diane Morgan
Helen Wallace, Patti's Mother
Kathie, Mom of Chrissie
Monika Hedglin
Susie, Jason's Mom
Maria, Christopher's Mommy

Thanks also for all of the wonderful submissions that will be featured in an upcoming Bringer of Light newsletter. Those who submitted will be notified when their submission will be included in the newsletter and also which month it will be featured in. Everyone is encouraged to make submissions for ANY of the catagories. You may do so by clicking on the 'submit button' below:

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In honor of our children please click on the links below:

If you are not on the mailing list already and you would like to receive the free monthly BRINGER OF LIGHT NEWSLETTER, just complete the form below:

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If your submission has appeared in a past Bringer of Light Newsletter, it may also appear again as an Encore Presentation.

Submissions are needed for many of the Bringer of Light Newsletter sections. YOU MAY SUBMIT UP TO A YEAR IN ADVANCE (just be sure to include the month your submission is for). Submissions are placed in the order that they are received and/or for a relevant month. Your submissions are the essence of the newsletter. So start typing and send in those submissions ASAP! Please go to the link below the section list to see a chart of available sections.

DEDICATIONS: Make a dedication to your child for their anniversary of birthday.

QUOTES: Share a quote relating to grief.

LETTERS TO HEAVEN: Write a letter to your child in Heaven.

LIFE STORY: Share the story of your child's life, your child's birth, your child's death, or all of these.

POETRY: Share a poem about your grief or your child.

SIGNS FROM THE OTHER SIDE: Share a sign that you or someone else received from your child.

IN THEIR OWN WORDS: Share a story, poem, quote, or anything written or spoken by your child.

MEMORIES: Share a special memory that you or someone else has of your child at any age.

DREAMS: Share a dream that you or someone else had of your child.

HUMOR: Share a funny memory you or someone else has of your child at any age.

PRIDE: Share an achievement, talent, unique characteristic, or anything that makes you proud of your child.

MEMORIALS: Share any way that you have memorialized your child.

QUESTION: Share your answer to one of the questions about grief.
(See list of questions in the NEWS section and/or the SUBMISSIONS page.

BLESSINGS: Share how you have been blessed at anytime in your life.

COMMENTS: Share a comment that you may have for any of the sections in the Bringer of Light newsletter.

When you enter the SUBMISSION PAGE there is a chart that will show the available sections so that you will know what is available to submit. The cart represents an entire year. You are invited to submit to any of the available sections and for any month. You may see the chart by clicking on the button below:



We would love to hear all about your child, or your grief, or your comments. You can participate in the BRINGER OF LIGHT NEWSLETTER by submitting to the above sections.


Last Entry in Luke's Journal:

"When there is love in my heart and a smile on my face,
I need nothing else." ~ Luke Ross