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2015
Bringer of Light newsletter






Welcome to the
BRINGER OF LIGHT NEWSLETTER

Thanks so much for your request to receive the monthly
BRINGER OF LIGHT NEWSLETTER.

LONG ENOUGH

When Luke was a little boy he always had to be sitting by me or holding my hand. No matter where we were Luke would say...."Mom, please sit by me." Every night when he went to bed he would pat his hand on the mattress and say.... "Mom, sit down and lets talk." We had some wonderful conversations right there in his room, just before he fell asleep, with me sitting on the edge of his bed. It just didn't last long enough. When he became a teenager he no longer needed to hold my hand, or sit by me, or be tucked in at night. I used to cry remembering how it used to be and long for those days again.

One night before Luke (age 20) had moved back home for the last time he called me from his apartment saying that his head was hurting so bad that he needed to go to the hospital. I said... "I will call 911." He said...."Please don't call, I just want you and Dad to come get me and take me to the hospital." So Robin (Luke's Dad) and I rushed over to his apartment. We walked him to the car and he asked if I would sit with him in the back seat. So of course I did. When we got in the back seat Luke laid his head down in my lap and was holding my hand while his dad drove us to the hospital. Luke was squeezing my hand tight and I was stroking his brow. Luke looked up at me and said..."Mom, don't let me die." I assured Luke that I would not let him die. But this promise did not last long enough because a year later Luke died.

After that night at the hospital Luke was very afraid of dying. He moved back home with us, but still was not able to sleep in his own bed. He would sit up late at night and watch TV to get his mind off of dying. He would ask me to sit up with him, and then when we got very tired Luke would lay down on the sofa and I would lay down on the love seat. Luke would reach out for my hand and say..."Mom, will you hold my hand until I fall asleep." Then we would both lay there in the living room with our hands stretched across the corner of where the sofa and the love seat met. The only sound was the fire crackling in the fireplace as we both drifted off to sleep. These special times did not last long enough.

Then one night when Luke had just turned 21 years old he had gone to bed with one of his migraine headaches. The next morning when he got up he said...."Mom, can you come outside on the patio, I need to talk to you." As he sat there with tears in his eyes he said..."Mom, I think I died last night. I went to this place.... but there are no words in our language to describe this place. The best way I can say it for you to understand is that I was in a room, although it wasn't really a room. Sitting across from me was an old man and he reached out and took my hands into his hands and the old man said.....It is not your time, you must go back. Then I woke up in my bed." I just stared into his tearful eyes with my now tearful eyes. I hugged him and said... "Luke, what do you think it means?" Luke said..."I don't know, Mom, but I think I am supposed to be here for a reason." After this Luke no longer had a fear of dying, or of being alone. He lived everyday happy and full of life as if everyday was his last. I really thought all of this was an affirmation from God that all would be okay. I never expected that my son would die before me. Because of this experience I just assumed that my son would live a long and full life. "It's not your time" did not last long enough.

When I think back on all of this I still do not know the reason that Luke was told to come back and that it was not his time. He died just a few months after this experience of his. He got a glimpse of Heaven and he returned. Because of that glimpse he lost all fear of dying and felt he had some special purpose. His experience touched me and made me think about how precious life is. Maybe because of this 'premonition' we were a little closer, a little more aware of life's miracle. Luke died without fear and so will I someday. Until that day I will continue to search my memories for his special purpose, and maybe come to know that his special purpose is simply to help others realize that there is no fear in dying, we all have a special purpose, and love does not have boundaries of time or space because love is forever. Many things in this life do not last long enough, but there is ONE thing that does..... Love lasts forever, and forever is long enough.

2015 Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001




IN MEMORY OF
Lucas Christopher Ross "Luke"
21
October 31, 1979 - April 3, 2001
Acute Bronchopneumonia






LONG ENOUGH

I didn't rock you long enough
Before you went to sleep.
And I didn't kiss you long enough
On your rosy little cheek.

I didn't read long enough
From your little picture book
And I didn't watch long enough
When you said... "Mommy Look!"

I didn't play long enough
With you and your little toys
And I didn't linger long enough
With you my little boy.

I didn't hug you long enough
When you squeezed my neck real tight
And I didn't stay long enough
When I tucked you in at night

I didn't laugh long enough
At the funny things you'd say,
And I didn't listen long enough
To the music that you played.

I didn't hold you long enough
When you were scared or sick.
And I didn't have you long enough
Life went by much too quick.

I didn't cry long enough
On that awful dreadful night.
And I didn't pray long enough
To try to make it right.

I didn't see you long enough
Before you said goodbye.
And I didn't touch you long enough
Just after you had died.

I haven't waited long enough
For my soul to be set free.
But I have suffered long enough.....
To earn eternity.


2015 - Christine Ross

~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001

Find and be found to discover your.....
BRINGER OF LIGHT.
The name LUCAS means Bringer of Light




CAN'T CRY HARD ENOUGH

I'm gonna live my life
Like everyday's the last
Without a simple goodbye
It all goes by so fast

And now that you're gone
I can't cry hard enough
No I can't cry hard enough
For you to hear me now

I'm gonna open my eyes
And see for the first time
I've let go of you like
A child letting go of his kite

There it goes
Up in the sky
There it goes
Beyond the clouds
For no reason why

I can't cry hard enough
No I can't cry hard enough
For you to hear me now

I'm gonna look back in vain
And see you standing there
With all that remains
Its just an empty chair

And now that you're gone
I can't cry hard enough
No I can't cry hard enough
For you to hear me now

There it goes
Up in the sky
There it goes
Beyond the clouds
For no reason why

I can't cry hard enough
No I can't cry hard enough
For you to hear me now

~ PERFORMED BY: By The Williams Brothers
~ WRITTEN BY: ETZIONI, MARVIN / WILLIAMS, DAVID B.





Can't Cry Hard Enough" is a song originally performed by The Williams Brothers, and written by David Williams and Marvin Etzioni from the band Lone Justice.[1] The song peaked at number 42 on the Billboard Hot 100 in 1992.

~ SOURCE: WIKIPEDIA






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OUR USA MILITARY CHILDREN

STAFF SERGEANT Adam R. Fiock*** HM2 Athan Scott Allen*** SPC Andrew Paul Wade ***

CORPORAL Brian Joseph Parker *** PFC Brandon Tyler Beshada*** SPC 4 SPECIALIST Brandon Wesley Sgaggero *** LANCE CORPORAL Brandon C. Dewey *** SPC Brandon Lee Stout ***

A1C Corey Christopher James*** SFC Christopher Scott Paxton *** CORPORAL Christopher J. Lapka *** SFC Carlos Marcelino Santos-Silva *** CAPTAIN Christopher F. Soelzer***

AIRMAN Daniel Bruce Conley *** LANCE CORPORAL Dustin Marshall Rawls *** LIEUTENANT JG Douglas Walter Lamay*** SPC Darrell W. Shipp *** TECH SARGEANT David Paul Heuslein *** SGT. Derek Christian Wentz*** SGT David Samuel Collins *** CHIEF PETTY OFFICER David N. Beaulieu ***

PRIVATE Heath Douglas Warner ***

PV2 Isaac T Cortes ***

SERGEANT Jason Randall Johnson*** AIRMAN James Neal Smith*** PFC Joshua Eugene Hedglin*** LANCE CORPRAL Jessee Ryan Tracey*** SGT Jason Alan Schumann*** SSGT Jason Daniel Whitehouse *** SPECIAL OPS James E. "Wati" Waters *** PETTY OFFICER 1st CLASS Joseph Adam McSween *** SPECIALIST Joshua Clinton Farmer *** LANCE CORPORAL Justin Douglas Linscott *** SSG Jeremy D Vrooman***

3rd CLASS PETTY OFFICER Keith E. Combsl*** PFC Kerri Nicole Larsen *** AIRMAN BASIC Kurt Alan Miller***

SERGEANT Lee William Harris*** PRIVATE 1st CLASS Louis MIchael (LOUIE) Johnson ***

HC 2nd CLASS Marty Gillespie *** SPC4 Michael Lee Nevils*** SGT. Michael Adam Marzano *** PFC Michael Ray Shelly *** STAFF SERGEANT Michael G. Owen *** PETTY OFFICER 2nd CLASS Michael Burton ***

SPC. Nicholas E. Wilson ***

SPECIALIST Philip Cody Ford*** SEA CADET E-3 Pamela Lynne Reid***

SPC-4 Randy Reed Hecox *** LANCE CORPORAL Robert (Robby) Rogers III *** HN Robert Nathaniel Martens *** CHIEF MASTER SERGEANT Robert Randolph Fisher ***

AIRMAN FIRST CLASS Scott M. Schroeder*** 1ST SERGEANT Scott Allen Johnson*** PVT1 Sam Williams Huff *** MAJOR Sean Cedric Douglas ***

CORPORAL Timothy Patrick Parker *** SPC Trenton Alan Dove*** MP Thomas Beckett Hensley III***

CORP William "Bubba" Taylor ***

SSG Zachary A. Darras ***

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Please view the SPECIAL PRESENTATION in the NEWS SECTION.
A TRIBUTE TO OUR FALLEN HEROS
created by Dolores Tucker, Mother of Dennis Tucker.

VISIT OUR CHILDREN'S PHOTO PAGE



















ANNIVERSARY AND BIRTHDAY
DEDICATIONS

MAY BIRTHDAYS

Jake Gagnon 5
Noah Hunley BornToHeaven
Amanda Morrow 19
Tina Mc Quaig 27
Amanda (Mandy) Smith 17
Geoff Edwards 18
Twins Robert & Keith Clark 8 hrs
Brittany Guleff 24
Christopher Faller 7
Sean Riley 21
Ashley Corneau 21
Bryan Esposito 20
Chad Norris 20
Jason Ainsworth 29
Radomir Rade 33
Brant TEENSY Alberty 15
Daniel Staib 23
Cerridwyn KERRY Lujan 19
Erik Villela-Simone 17
Brian Markee 23
Kanda Jacobs 30

MAY ANNIVERSARIES

Rachel 19
Brian Selhorst 22
Noah Hunley BornToHeaven Glen Van Der Walt 22
Peter Van Der Walt 32
Robby Rogers 19
William Pucket 31
Lauren Niederer 16
Jason Grubbs 25
Twins Robert & Keith Clark 8 hrs
Mindy Clark 22
Derick Springer 23
Crawford Carnahan 18
Pauli Shanno 9
Oran Jones 19
Michael Schrimpscher 19
Amanda Curcio 17
Cerridwyn KERRY Lajan 19
Evelin Meyer 4mos
Derek Wentz 36
Geoff Edwards 18
Robert BOBBY Digan 18
Jerry Lain 33
Allen Boring Jr 32
Allen Boring 32
Giankarlo Squicimai 31
Samantha Zima 15
Sean Douglas 36



IN MEMORY OF
Brian Selhorst
22
June 13,1986 to May 1, 2009
Leukemia (ALL)
SUBMITTED BY
Mary Ann (momdukes)


Dear Brian, I miss you so much. Nothing is the same without you. I hope you are at peace. I love you so much. Mom




IN MEMORY OF
Michael Schrimpscher
19
10/23/89-5/14/09
SUBMITTED BY
Cindy, Michael's mom


We miss our Michael every day, we honor his life with every passing breath. We miss him, we love him, always. We are strong believers in signs, and the most powerful sign was not too long after Michael crossed over. I went down to the kitchen one night, after bedtime, looking for our rottweiler Cheyenne, Michael's favorite dog. As I went into the kitchen, Cheyenne was staring at one of the chairs at the kitchen table and she was whining lightly and wagging her tail, I said her name out loud and she was so focused on that chair, I knew it was Michael there talking to her. I had to literally stand in front of her line of sight to get her attention to come upstairs and I blew a kiss to Michael and said thank you so very much. I have had many signs and dreams and I am forever thankful, for those are my sanity.



IN MEMORY
Crawford Alan Carnahan
18
August 21, 1988 ~ May 12, 2007
Leptospirosis
SUBMITTED BY
Alan ~ loving father to Crawford


Crawford, my son;

May 12, 2015...8 years after you died and left us behind.

The wanting and longing for you will never stop. Each day...I think of you. Each day that I think of you; I cry. Each tear stains my face once again.

I look back at pictures of myself before you died. I look younger and had smiles upon my face. I now look into the mirror each day and see an old man starring back at me. Yes; eight years can put some age on me; but, I believe that the grief of losing you has caused premature aging. Can one die from a broken heart? Yes, they can...in many ways.

I wrote and shared a short letter that I composed 4 years and 1 month after you died. I sat down at the computer and wrote it all at one sitting and without any revisions. It just poured out of me as though my heart's blood was forming the letters as I wrote it. I could hardly type it as I had a hard time seeing through my tears.

I will post the letter here for your 8th remembrance year...it's simply called "TIME"

I love you and miss you terribly; son...

"Time" doesn't change how I feel about you, Crawford. But, it does cloud my memories of you, though. I find myself remembering a memory that I hadn't thought of for awhile. It brings happiness and sadness at the same time. I love to hear from other people that remember you and who can tell me stories of you that I hadn't heard before or retell stories that I had forgotten.

"Time" causes my skin to wrinkle and sag as I grow older; but, my memory of your face never has you growing older. Through "time"; I find that the overwhelming grief that I once had after your death, is now just a bellow from a hole in my heart. Once upon a "time", I cried so hard that I thought that I were going to die myself. "Time" has made me cry less; but, the crying is never over. A mention of your name, an image of you, a remembrance of something that you did; or just the mere thought of you, brings tears.

Death has robbed me of our "time" together. "Time" spent with you as a family. "Time" is forever passing as I grow older. I want that "time" back in the worst of ways. A wish to reverse "time" will never be. I do wish that I was give the "time" to say my goodbyes to you.

I will never be able to get that "time" back with you...until...IT IS MY "TIME".

Written by your loving father...Alan Carnahan 06/27/2011



IN MEMORY OF
Bryan Esposito
20
5/13/79-2/11/2000
unknown
SUBMITTED BY
Irene, Mom


My baby boy, u are so missed, I cant believe its almost 15 yrs. Although it feels like I have not hugged u forever, time has gone by so fast. My life has not been the same and never will be. Lossing u has caused me to lose my identity. I am lost, I dont feel complete. As much as I have tried to move forward I have realized that its impossiable.



IN MEMORY OF
Noah Jordan Hunley
11weeks gestation
5-01-97
Miscarriage
SUBMITTED BY
Cindy, Noah's Mom


In memory of Noah Jordan Hunley
May 01, 1997
Always alive in my heart



IN MEMORY OF
Amanda Taylor Smith
17
May 6, 1983 - September 21, 2000
Auto Accident
SUBMITTED BY
Teri Smith Anderson


Mandy,
If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane,
I would walk right up to Heaven and bring you home again.
I will always love you.
Mom



IN MEMORY OF
Brittany Brooks Guleff
24
5/7/85 - 3/26/10
Bronchopneumonia
SUBMITTED BY
Pam Brooks


Brittany Brooks Guleff born May 7, 1985. She will be 30 years old but no one will remember, except me, her mother. I would like her to know how much I love and miss her. In special memory of my beautiful daughter who will never be forgotten as long as I'm breathing.



IN MEMORY OF
Christopher Ronald Faller
7-1/2 years
May 7, 1990 - March 24, 1998
viral tumors after successful piggyback heart transplant
SUBMITTED BY
Maria, Christopher's mommy forever


C ourageous
H elpful
R ighteous
I ndividual
S pecial
T rusting
O ur first son
P rayerful
H appy
E xtraordinary
R emember him...

Christopher Ronald Faller
May 7, 1990 - March 24, 1998
Forever remembered by his mother Maria, his father Ron, his siblings Rachel and Mark

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QUOTES:

MEMBER QUOTE:


IN MEMORY OF
Daniel Scott Forrester
30
2/28/70 ~ 1/10/2001
non-hodgkins lymphoma
SUBMITTED BY:
Arlene (Danny's Mom)


God's blessings and peace to all. ~ Arlene Gundrsen, February 2013

MEMORIAL QUOTE:


IN MEMORY OF
Sean Ernest Stenzel
27
DOB 3/13/1984 - DOD 7/31/2011
Car accident
SUBMITTED BY
his mother Mary Stenzel


"It has been said time heals all wounds. I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind protecting it's sanity covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens, but it's never gone." ~ Rose Kennedy


IN MEMORY OF
Christopher Ronald Faller
7-1/2 years
May 7, 1990 - March 24, 1998
viral tumors after successful piggyback heart transplant
SUBMITTED BY
Maria, Christopher's mommy forever


"The best and most beautiful things cannot be seen, nor touched, but are felt in the heart." Helen Keller



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LETTERS


IN MEMORY OF
Geoffrey Philip James Edwards
18
6 May 1984 - 22 May 2002
heroin overdose given by a friend
SUBMITTED BY
Karen Lyn Jenkins


My Beloved Geoff: It is 12 years since you left me alone to try to pick up the pieces of my life. You are the light of my life and when you died, my light died. You are my only child and when I lost you, I lost any chance I had at a genetic future. The sorrow and grief I feel is not as brutal but it has never gone from me. I feel empty inside my heart no matter what happens to me. I just loved you so deeply and so much. You made me so happy and content with my life. I was not rich in money but I was rich in love and I so adored you. It was a good, good life I once had. It is different now; I grieve still and won't ever stop grieving. I am lost. I remember so many things about our life together. It is bittersweet. My dearest son, I miss you so much.

Mom to Angel Geoff, Karen Jenkins





IN MEMORY OF
Jason Beau Morgan
23
July 31, 1979 and October 10, 2002
Aneurysm
SUBMITTED BY
Diane Morgan


My Mother's Day Wish

My Sweet Beau,

Mother's Day is drawing near...How I wish I could hear your laughter! My greatest wish would be for you to be here to hold you so tightly, smell your wonderful scent, and hear your voice...to look into your hazel green eyes and see your BEAUtiful smile!!! What a wonderful gift this would be, to have you on this earth again. In this unimaginable and horrible reality, I know that this cannot be. How can I make it through the day without you? My Mother's Day wish is to receive a very special sign from you, a sign that I know is only from you. I ask that you come to me in a dream before this day, so that I can make it through. I will wait till Mother's Day for my wish to come true. Please come see me; I need you so much on this very special day!



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LIFE STORIES


IN MEMORY OF
Christopher Ronald Faller
7-1/2 years
May 7, 1990 - March 24, 1998
viral tumors after successful piggyback heart transplant
SUBMITTED BY
Maria, Christopher's mommy forever

Our brave little Christopher left us on March 24, 1998 because of viral complications after a successful piggyback heart transplant the preceding October. I had heard some other songs that this wonderful singer/songwriter named Michael Peace had made for other bereaved parents. When I contacted him to ask if he could write a song for my Christopher, at first he told me that he was very busy and might not get to it for awhile. The very next day, I had an email from Mr. Peace saying that Christopher would not leave him alone until he wrote his song. The song lyrics were in the email from him. He recorded the song that very same day. I found that to be amazing, and just so wonderful for Mr. Peace to share that with me.

Little Boy At Play (Christopher's Song)

Copyright Michael Peace 2002 All Rights Reserved

Little boy at play
Star wars, Legos and Army toys
Building castles and dreams
Just like all of the other boys

Christopher said that he knew
Good guys always win
But when he lost his fight
Our world came crashing in

(And his mommy cried)
Someday we'll be together again
Someday I just don't know when
Someday when I see the sun shine
I will see your angel face looking back on mine

Christopher your Mommy knows
You are up in heaven
I know you can feel her love
And her love will never end.

(Guitar Solo)

(And his mommy cried)
Someday we'll be together again
Someday I just don't know when
Someday when I see the sun shine
I will see your angel face looking back on mine

* You can hear this incredibly beautiful and touching song on this web page
-- http://legobeaver.com/christopher/song/christopherssong.html



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POETRY



IN MEMORY OF
Christopher Ronald Faller
7-1/2 years
May 7, 1990 - March 24, 1998
viral tumors after successful piggyback heart transplant
SUBMITTED BY
Maria, Christopher's mommy forever



Happy Birthday, sweet Angel Christopher,
Twenty-five years ago today
you were sent to us as a special gift,
But we didn't know that you could not stay.

I held you in my arms,
And you held all of our love in your heart.
We only got the chance to hold you for seven short years,
Then our world was torn apart.

I remember your birthday in earlier years,
Filled with joy and not with tears.
With many smiles and laughter too,
Your seven birthdays here we celebrated with you.

But now your birthday is a sad time,
Your laughter we hear no more.
But I know we would see your happy face
If we could see you today through Heaven's door.

So today on your 25th birthday we gather together
With balloons at your final resting place,
And with such sorrow in our hearts
And tears on our faces.

We send up to Heaven
These balloons filled with our love,
And I imagine you reaching down
And catching them in Heaven above.

Today you celebrate another birthday
In that beautiful place called heaven,
But we will always celebrate the day
That God sent us an angel, who sadly is forever seven.

In Loving memory of Christopher Ronald Faller
May 7, 1990 - March 24, 1998
With all of our love on your 25th Birthday,
Mommy, Daddy, Rachel and Mark



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SIGNS



IN MEMORY OF
Randy Reed Hecox
30 Years
1/7/69 to 7/23/99
GSH
SUBMITTED BY
Ali Hecox


I'VE HAD SO MANY SIGNS.....

MY DOGGIE GIZMO, ONE TIME, WENT TO THE ROCKER I HAD AND SHE WAGGED HER TAIL AND LOOKED UP AND BARKED LIKE SOME ONE WAS THERE. THERE WAS NO ONE BUT I FEEL RANDY WAS THERE. SHE ALSO USE TO GO TO MY OFFICE AND LOOK AT HIS PICTURES I HAD ALL AROUND THE ROOM ON THE FLOOR BY HIS DRUMS AND WAG HIS TAIL.

SO MANY THINGS......

THE ROCKER WAS ROCKING ONE DAY.

RIGHT AFTER I LOST HIM AND THE FUNERAL WAS OVER AND ALL WENT BACK HOME TO THEIR JOBS AND ETC.... I WAS LAYING ON THE BED MID DAY AND MY THEN HUBBY WAS IN THE KITCHEN DOING DISHES. I KNEW THIS AS I HEARD HIM BUT YET THE MATTRESS WENT DOWN LIKE SOMEONE SAT ON IT. I TURNED OVER TO TELL MY HUBBY I WAS OK, JUST RESTING AND AS GOD IS MY WITNESS THERE WAS NO ONE THERE, AT LEAST TO THE HUMAN EYE. BUT I KNEW IN MY HEART THAT WAS ALSO RANDY.

I CAN GO ON AND ON.

AT THE TWINS BIRTHDAY PARTY, HE LOVED THEM (NIECES OF HIS) SO MUCH. WE ALL KNEW IT WAS HIM TURNING OUT THE LIGHTS ON US. EVEN ONE TWIN SHIAN SAID GRAND MA THAT'S RANDY. I SAID YES IT WAS.



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IN THEIR OWN WORDS

written or said by our children



IN MEMORY OF
Stephen Hasbrouck
29
7-17-82/11-14-11
Cardiac arrest
SUBMITTED BY
Maryann Hasbrouck
WRITTEN BY
Stephen Hasbrouck


I'm on a roller coaster it can only go down
No ups and down on this coaster it's headed south
All my hopes are gone to hell, why not my soul along with it
Life is over as far as I'm concerned
I long lived for something, now I live for nothing
Life is a meaningless obstacle, I no longer need to overcome
Striving for my ultimate goals now seem such a waste of time
Let it all come to hell with me
I will drag every last piece of what meant something to me down
I will bury it deep where my soul rests, I have no soul. I am dead.



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SPECIAL MEMORIES



IN MEMORY OF
Christopher Neil Thomas
16
September 12, 1989 - November 19,2005
wreck
SUBMITTED BY
Patsy, Mom to Christopher


Memories are so precious and thinking back when Christopher was probably about 3 or so, we all tell our child, don't run with that, if you fall it will go straight through you!!! Well Christopher was pushing a broom in front of him and ran it under an open door and the broom stuck but he kept going!!! The handle jabbed him in the lower stomach and knocked him down. What happen next was absolutely priceless... he got up hands throwed out so I could see his stomach but he was scared to look I guess and with a trembling voice said " Did it go all the wayyyy through meeeeee!!!! He just knew that handle had went all the way through him... Bless his heart he toted a large bruise for a while but he never ran with a broom anymore. Gotta love em for ever!!!!





IN MEMORY OF
Daniel Scott Forrester
30
2/28/70 - 1/10/2001
non-hodgkins lymphoma
SUBMITTED BY
Mom (Arlene)

APRIL SHOWERS BRING MAY FLOWERS


I will always remember when Mother's Day came around, Danny would "scout" the yard for flowers. Any weed that had some color to it, was a flower (lol). He would pick me a handful of beautiful weeds which were picked with love. I would make a big fuss and put them in a small glass and put them on the table. We would all go to church and I sat there looking at my children and I'd get tears in my eyes....just overwhelmed with LOVE. Then, after church, we would take the hour ride and go visit my Mom. The kids LOVED Grandma Scholtz. They loved to sit around and sing. Such wonderful memories.



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DREAMS



IN MEMORY OF
Cerridwyn "Kerry" Maire Ursula Brigid Roseanne Lujan
19 years and 3 days
May 17, 1989 - May 20 2008
Double hit and run
SUBMITTED BY
Judy Lujan


Right after Kerry's death, several of her friends dreamed the same dream: that they were all hanging out as usual and they suddenly remembered and asked Kerry didn't she die? Kerry started laughing and then they woke up. I have had a few dreams of Kerry since her death. In the dreams she's always of different ages: as a toddler, as a young child, as a "tween" and as a young adult as she was when she died. The best dream was when I dreamed she was cuddled up next to me like she used to come get in bed with me and do. When I woke up, the spot where she lay in the dream was warm.



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FUNNY MEMORIES OF OUR CHILDREN



IN MEMORY OF
Tina Marie McQuaig
27
5/5/72 3/15/00
Homocide
SUBMITTED BY
Linda


Way back when Tina was in high school... she noticed a piece of beef jerky on the dining room table. Her brother Chris was sitting at the table and told us what happened next. Tina picked up the jerky and popped it in her mouth. Chris started to laugh his head off and Tina could not understand what was so funny. He then told her that she ate one of the dogs jerky treats (Beggin Strips). She started running to the sink to spit it out and wash her mouth out. She told us afterwards that the jerky was not bad.. LOL we teased her over this for the rest of her short life.... Missing her so much it still hurts.
Always Tina's mom,
Linda Rice



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OUR CHILDREN'S ACHIEVEMENTS, TALENTS, HONORS, AWARDS, AND UNIQUE CHARACTERISTICS



IN MEMORY OF
Adam R. Fiock
26
July 1st 1981. October 6th, 2007
Self inflicted GSWH
SUBMITTED BY
Christine Adam's M♡M


Whenever I see the preview for the new war movie, I am proud of my soldier. Adam was not a sniper, however he had his jeep bombed twice. He kept trading his leave with others who needed it.

Just the heat, the responsibility, etc. All of Adam's 150 some soldiers group came back intact which is unheard of. I am soooo proud of you, Adam. Always and please! know this.

Love, M♡M



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MEMORIALS

ROAD SIDE, HEADSTONE, URN, GARDEN, DISPLAY, PUBLICATION, BENCH, STATUE, PLAQUE, BRICK, SIGN, STONE, ROOM, SPORT, PLACE, WEB SITE, POEM, STORY, BALLOON, CAKE, ITEM .....



IN MEMORY OF
Crawford Alan Carnahan
18
August 21, 1988 ~ May 12, 2007
Leptospirosis
SUBMITTED BY
Alan ~ loving father

On Crawford's 8th remembrance year...May 12, 2015


To keep my depression at bay and my mind busy; I decided to make a website memorial for my son, Crawford. I started looking at memorial websites made by other parents that had also lost a child. I was drawn to the websites that not only used graphics; but, specially those that used animated graphics.

I wanted to make a memorial website for my son that was as unique as I saw him. I decided to teach myself website designing and how to read HTML code. I dove into making his memorial site and spent the first two years after Crawford's death teaching myself and in making this website. I eventually bought a 3D animation program and started making 3D animations. Please view his "animated" memorial website and help me keep his memory alive. I bring "life" through animated graphics and 3D animations that I have placed upon all of the pages as they tell about his short life. Here is the link to his website: http://crawford-carnahan.virtual-memorials.com/

Also; one of Crawford's best friends, Anthony Thompson, informed me that he and his wife had another son that that was born on the 23rd of May. Anthony told me that Crawford was his best friend and he wanted to honor their friendship, so, he named his son after Crawford. His son's name is CRAWFORD KYLE-LEE THOMPSON.

I cried when he first told me what he was going to do in Crawford's memory. Anthony told me that he was going to tell his son all about Crawford and why he was given such a unusual first name. Anthony cherishes their friendship and he said that he will be reminded of Crawford each and every time he calls out his son's name. Now; that's a true friend.

The memory of you will live on through others.

Love you and miss you each day of each passing year...

Your father



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The question answered is chosen from a list of questions
in the news section and also on the submission page.




IN MEMORY OF
Joey Whiteman
21 years, 360 days
9/8/80-9/3/02
auto accident/blunt force trauma to aoerta
SUBMITTED BY
Joey's Mom (Terri Whiteman, now in Heaven with her son)

Does your child communicate with you from the other side?

I really do believe our angels communicate with us, I hear him in my thoughts at night as I'm saying my prayers. If something is wrong I think I hear him tell me what to do about it. I feel him touch my hair as I'm on the computer, he always sounds happy, that makes me feel great.



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to be placed in a future newsletter.
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BLESSINGS



IN MEMORY OF
Robert Dennis "Bobby" Digan
18 yrs
March 23, 1973-May 23,1991
Special Needs & surgery error
SUBMITTED BY
Mom & Dad


A special Blessing we have recieved was from Father Kaz, a Marian Father from Stockbridge, MA. We are making a DVD of our life. As I have recieved the Miracle that Beatify St. Faustina, so Father Kaz was interviewed. He also knew our little Bobby very well.

When he made this statement on the DVD it made us very proud parents of a child the suffered so much. For one and a half years not even a drop of water passed through Bobby's lips. Very painful to think of, as we knew he smelled the food. Never a complaint came out of his precious lips.

Father Kaz was going to spend ten minutes with Bobby in his bedroom playing computer games, before Father drove to Washington, DC. Well he left two hours later. He enjoyed Bobby so much. This is what he said about Bobby on the DVD which brings tears to my eyes every time I hear these words.

"Bobby never complained, he accepted his suffering peacefully in his heart. He except all peacefully, with a living image of God in his Faithful heart'' . Please remember Bobby was a special needs child, and he told his Dad he was not afraid to go to Heaven. Why would anyone be afraid to go to Heaven and be with, God, Jesus, Mary. My Nana, Papa and my baby sister, what a strong faith filled child.

This has made his Dad and I so proud and Blessed of our little Bobby. We missed you, with your puppy dog eyes and cheshire cat smile.

Loved and deeply missed, Mom and Dad



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READER COMMENTS


COMMENTS SINCE LAST MONTH'S NEWSLETTER



IN MEMORY OF
Daniel Scott Forrester
30
2/28/70 - 1/10/2001
non-hodgkins lymphoma
SUBMITTED BY
Mom (Arlene)

APRIL SHOWERS BRING MAY FLOWERS


Happy Mother's Day to all the grieving MOMS. Our kids are close by. Close your eyes and "feel" their presence.



IN MEMORY OF: Adam R. Fiock
26
July 1, 1981 - October 6, 2007
Self inflicted wound
SUBMITTED BY: Christine Adam's M♡M


Dear Christine,

Thank you for this month's newslettet. I love your story about Luke and coins. I used to find dimes, but Adam used to make fun of me because I used to read the writings of Sylvia Browne. He would say that the dimes just fell out of people's pockets. Now I find pennies everywhere. I can hear him laughing.

Thank you for the help you give. Luke is so proud of you. He brags about his mom.



IN MEMORY OF
Christopher Ronald Faller
AGE: 7-1/2 years
May 7, 1990 - March 24, 1998
viral tumors after successful piggyback heart transplant
SUBMITTED BY
Maria, Christopher's mommy forever


Dear Christine - Every month, it amazes me how much time and effort you put into your newsletter. I sit hear reading, both laughing and crying. I would love to see a picture of Luke's smiley face made out of the coins, if you have a picture to share. The story about you finding the penny with Luke's birth year of 1979 in his room just gave me chills all over. We have found many pennies and other coins that speak to us as well. You know that I am holding you and your family very close to my heart as Luke's Heaven day approaches.
love and hugs,
Maria
Christopher's mommy forever



Make a comment about somthing in this month's newsletter
to be placed in next month's newsletter.








UPDATING ANNIVERSARY AND BIRTHDAY PAGES

The Angle Friends Anniversary and Birthday pages are in the process of being updated. Please take a look at them and request a graphic for your child. The addresses are further down in the news section under ANGEL FRIENDS.

NEW QUESTION

A new QUESTION has been added to the choices of QUESTIONS on the submission page and is also listed with the questions below. It is question number 11..... Did you have a premonition of your child's death? Explain

PHOTO ALBUM

Take a look at all of the beautiful faces in the PHOTO ALBUM. At present the PHOTO ALBUM contains 141 photos. Enter the PHOTO ALBUM below.



SUBMIT HERE

VISIT OUR CHILDREN'S PHOTO PAGE


SEND YOUR CHILD'S PHOTO BY EMAIL







LIST OF QUESTIONS

CHOOSE A QUESTION FROM THE LIST BELOW TO ANSWER:

1. What do you think Heaven is like?

2. Based on your personal experience what would you say to someone that has just lost their child and what hope could you give them?

3. How long has your child been gone physically and how long does it seem like your child has been gone? Explain

4. Do you feel as if your child has been forgotten by some family members and friends? Explain

5. Do you think our children that have died miss us? Explain

6. How has the death of your child changed you?

7. If you could choose to relive any day that you spent with your child, what day would you choose and why?

8. How would you define the grief that is felt with the loss of a child?

9. How has your life changed between the day your child died and now?

10. Does your child communicate with you from the other side? Explain

11. Did you have a premonition of your child's death? Explain






DEDICATION NAMES

If you have ever made a submission to the Bringer of Light Newsletter or if you have provided your child's information, your child's name should appear at the top of the Dedications Section when it is their anniversary or birthday. If you have not provided your child's information you may do so by replying to the BRINGER OF LIGHT NEWSLETTER email (please type INFORMATION in the subject line). You may also write a dedication to be included below the section names for your child's special dates to be placed in a future newsletter.






A TRIBUTE TO OUR FALLEN HEROS

by Dee Tucker, Mother of Dennis Tucker

Dedicated to the countless heroes who have sacrificed their lives for our freedom.

Click on the link below to view this presentation. Be sure to turn up your volume and maximize your screen. After viewing click your back button to return to the newsletter.





Special thanks for Bringer of Light Newsletter submissions this month:

Dolores Tucker, Mother of Dennis Tucker
Mary Ann (momdukes)
Cindy, Michael's mom
Alan ~ Loving father to Crawford
Irene, Mom of Bryan Esposito
Cindy, Noah's Mom
Terri Smith Anderson
Pam Brooks
Arlene, Mom of Daniel Forrester
Sean's Mother, Mary Stenzel
Karen Lyn Jenkins
Maria, Christopher's mommy forever
Ali Hecox
Maryann Hasbrouck
Patsy, Mom to Christopher
Judy Lujan
Linda, Tina's Mom
Christine, Adam's Mom
Terri Whiteman, Joey's Mom (now in heaven with Joey)
Mom and Dad of Bobby Digan
Diane Morgan

Thanks also for all of the wonderful submissions that will be featured in an upcoming Bringer of Light newsletter. Those who submitted will be notified when their submission will be included in the newsletter and also which month it will be featured in. Everyone is encouraged to make submissions to be placed in a future newsletter for ANY of the catagories . You may do so by clicking on the 'submit button' below:






Music playing:

CAN'T CRY HARD ENOUGH





In honor of our children please click on the links below:








WOULD YOU LIKE TO RECEIVE THE BRINGER OF LIGHT NEWSLETTER?
If you are not on the mailing list already and you would like to receive the free monthly BRINGER OF LIGHT NEWSLETTER, just complete the form below:

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If your submission has appeared in a past Bringer of Light Newsletter, it may also appear again as an Encore Presentation.




Submissions are needed for many of the Bringer of Light Newsletter sections for future newsletters. YOU MAY SUBMIT UP TO A YEAR IN ADVANCE (just be sure to include the month your submission is for). Submissions are placed in the order that they are received and/or for a relevant month. Your submissions are the essence of the newsletter. So start typing and send in those submissions ASAP! Please go to the link below the section list to see a chart of available sections for future newsletters.


DEDICATIONS: Make a dedication to your child for their anniversary of birthday.

QUOTES: Share a quote relating to grief.

LETTERS TO HEAVEN: Write a letter to your child in Heaven.

LIFE STORY: Share the story of your child's life, your child's birth, your child's death, or all of these.

POETRY: Share a poem about your grief or your child.

SIGNS FROM THE OTHER SIDE: Share a sign that you or someone else received from your child.

IN THEIR OWN WORDS: Share a story, poem, quote, or anything written or spoken by your child.

MEMORIES: Share a special memory that you or someone else has of your child at any age.

DREAMS: Share a dream that you or someone else had of your child.

HUMOR: Share a funny memory you or someone else has of your child at any age.

PRIDE: Share an achievement, talent, unique characteristic, or anything that makes you proud of your child.

MEMORIALS: Share any way that you have memorialized your child.

QUESTION: Share your answer to one of the questions about grief.
(See list of questions in the NEWS section and/or the SUBMISSIONS page.

BLESSINGS: Share how you have been blessed at anytime in your life.

COMMENTS: Share a comment that you may have for any of the sections in the Bringer of Light newsletter.


When you enter the SUBMISSION PAGE there are monthly calendars that will show the available sections so that you will know what is available to submit. The calenders represent an entire year. You are invited to submit to any of the available sections and for any month. You may see the monthly calendars by clicking on the button below:

VIEW AVAILABLE SECTIONS FOR SUBMISSIONS:

TELL US ALL ABOUT YOUR CHILD:


We would love to hear all about your child, or your grief, or your comments. You can participate in the BRINGER OF LIGHT NEWSLETTER by submitting to the above sections. Your submission will be placed in a future newsletter.
















"VISIT WITH LUKE"

Last Entry in Luke's Journal:

"When there is love in my heart and a smile on my face,
I need nothing else." ~ Luke Ross

"MAY THE FORCE BE WITH YOU"