2011 - PRESENT

LUCAS CHRISTOPHER ROSS.....FOREVER 21.... 2001....2002....2003....2004....2005...2006...2007.....2008.....2009.....2010.....2011.....2012.....2013.....2014.....2015.....2016.....2017

days since Luke was born



October 31, 1979 - April 3, 2001

21 years old

Acute Bronchopneumonia

BORN... Soda Springs, Idaho

DIED... Cave Creek, Arizona

CREMATED... Ashes rest in parent's home

PARENTS... Robin and Christine Ross

SISTER... Emily

Luke was born on Halloween in Soda Springs, Idaho

Luke died at the age of 21 at home in Cave Creek, Arizona
from Acute Bronchopneumonia

Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers



Baby boy come to me,
Come to me upon the wind.
Baby boy touch my heart,
Touch my heart and soul again.

Fly from where the angels dwell,
And fly into my dreams.
Take me back to yesterday,
Before the morning gleams.

Let me rock you in my arms,
And sing to you a lullaby.
Let me hold you baby boy,
Before you say goodbye.

Baby boy come to me,
Come to me upon the wind.
Baby boy touch my heart,
Touch my heart and soul again.

© Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001


It was a bright beautiful day when I found out that I was pregnant with our second child. This was in the days when the sex of a child was usually only revealed at birth. Oh how I longed for a radiant little boy. I never told anyone, of my secret wish for a baby boy, except for the child growing inside me. My husband was not even aware of my wish. I dared not tell anyone in fear that it would not come true. So me and my little baby were the only ones in the world who knew.... and we talked about it all the time because deep within my soul, I just knew my baby was a little boy. We had a relationship that was sparked from the very beginning.

Months later after a very difficult delivery, the doctor handed our new little one to the nurse as I was asking my husband.... "A boy or a girl?" He looked at me with this glowing smile, and tears steaming down his face saying.... "It's our boy!" I then knew that he too had that same secret wish. Luke my little spook came into this world beaming at 2 pm on HALLOWEEN. It was a TRICK getting him here, but he sure was a TREAT.

I knew at the moment of his birth that he possessed a very special lustrous gift that was still to be known. As he grew I soon discovered that he had the gift of knowing how to love unconditionally. Luke and his big sister, Emily, had their usual sibling rivalry, but there was a glimmering bond between those two, like nothing I had ever witnessed.

Kindergarten revealed something even more special about my sweet little boy... he regarded his new found friends with the same blazing unconditional love that he had shown for his family. Throughout elementary school, Luke sought out the child who was maybe just a little different...handicapped, impaired, from another country, other race, being teased, lonely, or just someone in need a little ray of sunshine in their life. Luke became that sunshine.

Middle school brought many more friends, but Luke still pursued the kids that needed a little extra love. Our family trips sparkled when shared with Luke's exceptional friends. Many times we had an extra place set at the table for a kid that Luke had taken under his wings. He was always the light that led others out of the darkness of being different.

In High school Luke was an active member in a youth group and would illuminate our home with kids from all walks of life. I woke up one morning to eleven hungry high school boys who had been enlightened by Luke's unconditional love. Luke had a gift for seeing beyond how others defined these kids... by their piercings, hair color, unusual clothes, race, disabilities, lifestyle choice, or personal problems. Luke saw these friends as an opportunity to spread his light. And spread his light he did.

Age 21 produced even more radiance. At Luke's new job he befriended another special person. His new friend was partially paralyzed in one arm and had difficulty speaking because of cerebral palsy. Luke and he became the very best of friends. Most people could not understand this new friend when he spoke, but Luke could. Not only did Luke understand his words, Luke understood his heart. After Luke died, his friend confided in me how blessed he was to have had Luke in his life for only six short months, but that Luke's light would continue to warm his heart forever.

At Luke's service we had an open microphone, and his new friend bravely spoke to the crowd of friends and family that had gathered in the chapel. As his friend spoke most of the people in the chapel did not understand his words. But that didn't matter because the most important person in the chapel, Luke, understood his words just as he always did. As others also stood in front of the chapel and spoke, I noticed the soft light coming through the stained glass windows. I knew that my Bringer of Light was surrounding all of us with his warm and gentle light.

Luke always seemed to be looking towards Heaven as if absorbing its beacon. He brightened the lives of so very many in his short lifetime and he made a radiant difference to some who otherwise may still be wandering in the dark. There are a lot of people in this world today that are haloed with a special glow because of the spark that Luke ignited within their soul.

I found my Bringer of Light a very long time ago in 1979 and he brightened my world for 21 years. When he died I thought that his light had died with him. But he found me...... and he is still brightening my days even through my grief. I find that his sunshine can make me happy, and I also find that his sunshine can make me cry. But through the laughter or through the tears his sunshine always, always, always somehow finds me.

The name LUCAS means..... "BRINGER OF LIGHT". Luke was a shining example to his name and continues to honor the meaning of his name by being an eternal... "BRINGER OF LIGHT".

2011 Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001


I miss him as dawn is beginning to break,
When I awake to another day
And his memory is gently on my mind.

I miss him in the early morning breeze
When I catch a scent of pine trees
And breath in all the feelings that scent evokes.

I miss him in the mid day sunshine
When I see brightness all around me
And I smile remembering all of our times together.

I miss him in the afternoon quietness
When I hear a faint echo of laughter
And I laugh out loud just imagining it is him.

I miss him as the sun is beginning to set
When I feel the warmth that it provides
And I can feel the touch of his hug in that warmth.

I miss him at the close of the day
When the stars appear in the night sky
And I wonder how long it will be until I see him again.

I miss him in the middle of the night
When I awake from a dream of him
And I long to go back to sleep to dream of him once more.

I miss him as dawn is beginning to break,
When I awake to another day
And his memory is gently on my mind.

I miss him always.....

2011 - Christine Ross
In memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001






The silence leaves me empty
Like a note without a chord.
No more harmony or rhythm.
No more beating of his heart.

He found the melody of earth
But was born for better things.
The music deep within his soul
Came to rest on angel wings.

2012 - Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001


Summer was gone and the landscape had been repainted with vibrant colors. It was October 1979. We were living in the beautiful little farming community of Soda Springs, Idaho with its population of 3,000 and soon to be 3,001. Our daughter Emily was 2 years old and I was 8 months pregnant waiting for the birth of Luke. The air was filled with a fragrant chill and the colors of Autumn had descended upon this little town. Halloween had also made its presence known with decorations on almost every door and window. On weekends we would go to the little town park and let Emily play on the swings and run across the baseball field. There was also a natural geyser in town that would shoot high into the clear blue October sky. Emily loved to watch it as she pointed and giggled. We loved walking downtown and browsing in the stores. There was a pharmacy there with an original ice cream bar with the old-time swivel bar stools. Emily loved to sit high upon the stool and spin while waiting for her ice cream cone. On Sundays after church we would take drives past the farmland and the mountains. That October sunshine warmed our hearts, soft winds whispered to us, Autumn leaves gently fell around us, moonlight reflected in our eyes, until the last day of October brought to us a pleasure that held a secret. On Halloween, October 31, 1979 Luke was born in a little hospital right there in town. That memorable October was one that would tug on our hearts forever. We lived in Soda Springs for the first year of Luke's life and I possess those sedating memories of rocking my baby boy to sleep. Luke grew up knowing all about Soda Springs and what a wonderful adventure it was for all of us. Shortly after Luke's 21st and last birthday he told me that he was thinking about someday going back to Soda Springs. He never got that opportunity. That secret from twenty-one years ago was revealed. Luke died on April 3, 2001, about 6 months after he told me he wanted to go back home, back to his birthplace.

A few months ago my husband Robin and I decided to spend the evening watching a movie. So he began searching for a movie under the NEW RELEASES for Netflix Instant. As he was scrolling through I said...."Oh my God! Look at the name of that movie." Robin said..."Oh my God". The name of the movie was SODA SPRINGS..... the name of the town that Luke was born in. I said..."You don't really think it could be about Soda Springs, Idaho do you?" Robin said... "Well, I don't know anywhere else it could be." I knew that Soda Springs' population was still about the same and couldn't imagine that a movie would be written about that little town.

As we started watching this movie called SODA SPRINGS we recognized that the very first scenes in the movie were in the little town that Luke was born in. There was the Geyser that was the town's namesake, the same geyser that we enjoyed so very many years ago, right there on the screen. We noticed that in the movie everyone had Idaho license plates, so we were sure that it was Soda Springs, Idaho. There was the farm land that we used to drive by, there were the mountains, there was the park, there was downtown Soda Springs. It was all there, all those memories from 1979!

We were so amazed and were so excited that there was a movie, from 2011 that was about the town that Luke was born in. It was a story about modern-day cowboys. But there unfolding on the screen was more than just a movie, it was a story full of memories and signs from Luke. The main character had a son, and his son's name was Christopher (Luke's middle name). The little boy played baseball in the same park where we used to take Emily and Luke to play. The main character's name was EDEN and he had been in a car wreck 8 years earlier where an older couple had died. He went to the cemetery to visit their graves. Their date of death was OCTOBER 1, 2001. (Luke was born in OCTOBER and he died in the year 2001.) Eden worked in a feed store in Soda Springs. As he was checking someone out at the register he said... "That will be 31.79". (Luke was born on the 31st, 1979 in Soda Springs, Idaho). Then Eden said..."Here's your change, 21 cents". (Luke died at the age of 21). Eden also loved to play the guitar, just like Luke.

All the memories of that October 1979 came flooding back and brought Robin and I to tears. As we watched that movie with the name of Luke's birthplace in the title, with Luke's middle name, with Luke's year of death, with Luke's month of birth, with Luke's day of birth, with Luke's year of birth, with Luke's age at death, we knew that a wonderful gift had been delivered right into our living room. After all those years since Luke's birth, and after all those years since Luke's death, we were graced with the knowing that he had finally made it back to Soda Springs..... all the way from his Heavenly home.

2012 Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001


The front door had that same old squeak
As I entered that empty place.
The walls were bare, the furniture gone
And the sounds of life had ceased.

I was at that home of long ago
Where he took his final breath,
Hoping to find some memories
Or maybe something that was left.

I took a breath and inhaled deep
My lungs filled with musty air.
"Please take me back to yesterday."
I pleaded to God in a prayer.

I opened the door to his room,
There he was sitting on the floor,
Singing a song with a smile on his face,
Strumming away on that old guitar.

He looked up at me and nodded,
So I reached out to stroke his hair,
But just as I did everything that I saw
Faded away and disappeared.

I knew my prayer had been answered
So I got down on my knees
To say a prayer of thankfulness
For all that was given to me.

As I walked away from his room
I turned back for one last glance
And there he was with his hand held out
Saying... "May I have this dance?"

We danced across the bedroom floor
And we danced right down the hall.
Then he bowed and kissed my hand
And said..."I'm so glad you came to call."

I smiled at him as he said "Goodbye".
Then he turned and faded away,
But somehow in that moment of time
I returned to yesterday.

The front door squeaked when I closed it
As I left that "so-called" empty place
Where I found some long lost memories
From a life that never ceased.

2012 - Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001






I still don't know how old you'd be...
I can't bear to do the math.
I only know I miss you more
With each year that has passed.

I wonder how your life would be?
Would you have a loving wife?
Would you have a child or two
To love throughout your life?

Would you live real close to us
Or would you live real far away?
Would you call me on the phone
And say "I love you"... everyday?

Would you come to visit
With your little boy and girl?
Would he look just like you
And would she be your world?

Would they call me grandma
And be the apples of my eye?
Would they outlive you and me
And grow old before they die?

So many things that could have been
But it's much too late for those
I'll just have to be content
With this life, for me, God chose.

I know just how my life would be
If you were here to share it with...
All this sorrow would be gone
And happiness would exist.

Heaven holds no pain or tears.
You'll never have to know this hurt.
But I still... can't help but wonder
How things could have been on earth.

2013 Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001


It was in the fall of 2000, and very close to Luke's 21st Halloween birthday. Luke was living at home with us for the very last time. He would soon be making his final journey in the Spring of 2001. It was such a pleasure to have him back home, if only for a little while. I had gone to the grocery store one October morning and saw in the ice cream section ice cream for dogs called Frosty Paws. So I just had to get some for our sweet little Basset Hound Blue. When I got home I unloaded the groceries. Luke and I and Blue Dog were the only ones home. I opened the box and gave one of the little vanilla cups of Frosty Paws to Blue. She absolutely loved it! I said...."Wow, that must really taste good." Luke said..."I wonder what it tastes like?" I said .... "I don't know, let's try it!" So Luke and I each got a spoon, scooped a little from one of the cups, and on the count of three we barely touched our tongues to it and it was absolutely HORRIBLE. But ol' Blue Dog sure did like it!

My husband Robin always liked to have a cup of vanilla ice cream after his dinner. It was almost time for Robin to get home from work so I said..."Hey Luke, lets tell dad we got him some ice cream and play a trick on him." (The only identification on the little cardboard cups was on the lids.) Luke said... "Okay, but you do it!" So I said..."Luke, now you just lay on the sofa like you are watching TV and don't give it away. Luke said... "Okay, no problem." It all seemed so appropriate since it was so close to Halloween.

Robin got home from work and we all had a nice dinner together. But during the dinner Luke and I were thinking of our plan to play a trick on Dad. I would look at Luke and he would get this silly grin on his face and I would just stretch my eyes wide in an attempt to silently tell him to not give away our secret!

After dinner we all went into the family room to watch some TV. After sitting there for a few minutes I said... "Hey Robin, would you like some desert?" Robin said..."Yes, what do you have?" I said..."Oh, I bought some little vanilla ice cream cups today." Robin said..."Yes, that sounds good!" So I went into the kitchen, got the little cup out of the freezer and removed the lid. By this time Luke was squirming on the couch, trying to hold in his laughter, so I gave Luke another "don't you laugh" look. Then I handed the cup of Frosty Paws to Luke's unsuspecting Dad. By this time, Luke was squirming even more, and his face was getting red, as he was trying so hard to conceal our secret. I glanced over at Luke with another one of my discerning looks. By then all Luke could do was to bury his head in the pillow, and then cover himself entirely up with the blanket. Next Robin stuck his spoon in the cup and scooped out a big ol' spoonful of what he thought was delicious vanilla ice cream and popped it into his mouth. He immediately got up and ran to the kitchen sink spitting it out of his mouth while saying... "What the Hell is this stuff?" Well by that time Luke and I were laughing uncontrollably. Luke was laughing so hard that he fell off of the sofa, but continued to laugh while rolling on the floor. He gave true meaning to ROFLMAO! His laughter from that day still echos through my heart and my soul and my mind.

That was so long ago, but to this day every time I see Frosty Paws in the freezer section of the grocery store I smile and sometimes I even laugh out loud. I can always feel Luke laughing with me from his new home that is in the 'place that's the best'. This little event in our live's is the tale of an October 'TRICK', and it will forever be there in the corners of my mind delivering a wonderful memory that arrives at unexpected times, warming my heart with a very special .....'TREAT'.

2013 Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001


When I die and they lay me to rest
Gonna go to the place that's the best
When I lay me down to die
Goin' up to the spirit in the sky

Goin' up to the spirit in the sky
That's where I'm gonna go when I die
When I die and they lay me to rest
Gonna go to the place that's the best

Prepare yourself, you know it's a must
Gotta have a friend in Jesus
So you know that when you die
He's gonna recommend you to the spirit in the sky

Gonna recommend you to the spirit in the sky
That's where you're gonna go when you die
When you die and they lay you to rest
You're gonna go to the place that's the best

Never been a sinner, I never sinned
I got a friend in Jesus
So you know that when I die
He's gonna set me up with the spirit in the sky

Oh, set me up with the spirit in the sky
That's where I'm gonna go when I die
When I die and they lay me to rest
I'm gonna go to the place that's the best

Go to the place that's the best








2013 - FROM MA-MA



Fourteenth Birthday in Heaven
Forever 21

In memory of

October 31, 1979 - April 3, 2001


It was late October, the night was perfect outside but I was inside in a noisy & crowded room. As I looked out across the room, in the distance I saw this incredibly handsome man. Our eyes met and I ran over to him. I had never met this man before that night, but we hit it off perfectly. We spent hours upon hours together laughing at the silliest things. From that night on the more I got to know this incredible man, the more I loved him. Our love was something indescribable. We did so many things together.... movies, lunches, TV, shopping, laughing, joking, and we even had some very special heartfelt talks together. It was great! This went on for months.

On that amazing night that we met, when I ran up to him from across the room, I turned to him at the stroke of midnight and said...."Happy 21st birthday Luke." You see, my only son had become a man. It was the first time I had ever known him as a man. We were in Las Vegas at a casino and it was October 30th, 2000, just a few minutes before midnight. It would soon be Halloween, Luke's 21st birthday. Luke was sitting at a slot machine with his hand on the lever waiting for midnight. He was impatiently checking his watching anticipating that moment. When that moment happened I was standing right next to him along with his older sister and his Dad. When he pulled that lever we all cheered... "Happy 21st birthday Luke!" As a waitress passed, Luke stopped her and said..."I'd like a JD and coke, please." She looked suspiciously at him and said ..."Well, I need to see some ID." So with an exaggerated grin on his face, as he was reaching for his back pocket, he confidently said..."No problem." She looked at his ID and said..."You have only been 21 for a few minutes". Luke said..."That's right, and I would like a JD and coke, please." I can't even put into words the happiness I saw in his eyes and the happiness I felt for him. Oh what a wonderful night it was! He drank a little too much that night but 'what the heck', he was at his prime, he was a man, he was twenty-one, he was my son, and there was no way we were going to deny him his freedom that he had finally gained.

It was only a little over 5 months from that night when Luke died alone in his room from acute bronchopneumonia. For a few short months I got to know my son as a man, a privilege denied to many. I will forever have those wonderful memories of that awesome night when my boy became a man. When I close my eyes at midnight this October 30th the memory of that sensational grin will guide me into Halloween as I say for the fourteenth time since that Las Vegas Halloween night ....."HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY LUKE".

2014 Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001


October and golden leaves are falling,
Drifting slowly to the ground in the wind.
It's Halloween, It's Luke's Birthday,
And he's twenty-one again.

With the changing of the trees around me,
There is a beauty in their dying leaves,
And if I listen really close,
His voice whispers in the breeze.

Like the trees that are barren in winter,
And are reborn again in early spring,
Luke's not gone no more than the trees.
He's alive in everything.

Light a candle on this Halloween night,
In honor of Lucas Christopher Ross.
He journeyed to a better place,
And he took that step across.

So every October when leaves are golden,
And tumbling to the ground in the wind,
Remember that it's Luke's Birthday,
And he's twenty-one again.

2001 - Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001


Lying in my bed I hear the clock tick,
And think of you
Turning in circles confusion
Is nothing new
Flashback to warm nights
Almost left behind
Suitcase of memories,
Time after...

Sometimes you picture me
I'm walking too far ahead
You're calling to me, I can't hear
What you have said
And you say go slow
I've fallen behind
The second hand unwinds

If you're lost you can look and you will find me
Time after time
If you fall I will catch you I'll be waiting
Time after time
If you fall I will catch you I will be waiting
Time after time
Time after time

After your picture fades and darkness has
Turned to grey
Watching through windows I'm wondering
If you're OK
And you say go slow
I've fallen behind
The drum beats out of time

If you're lost you can look and you will find me
Time after time
If you fall I will catch you I'll be waiting
Time after time
If you fall I will catch you I will be waiting
Time after time
Time after time

~ AS PERFORMED BY: Eva Cassidy
~ WORDS AND MUSIC BY: Cyndi Lauper and Rob Hyman


We were staying at the Star Trek Hilton in Las Vegas. That night for Luke's birthday dinner he chose to go to the Star Trek Bar called 'Quark's Bar'. He and Emily ordered a huge drink to share. It was called the 'Warp Core Breach'. A warp core breach was a beverage served in Quark's Bar on Star Trek: Deep Space 9. The drink was prepared in what looked like a large fishbowl and effervesced, emitting a large amount of foggy gas from the top of the bowl. Below are the photos of our dinner and that huge drink. Wonderful memories!














2014 Birthday Cake

2014 Birthday Flowers

Luke's place at home

Emily & Dave's cake for Luke

Sherman, Our Granddog

Gift from Emily, Dave, & Sherman

Gift from Arlene & Family

Gift from Terry, Rhonda, & Family


Once, in a little pond, in the muddy water under the lily pads,
there lived a little water beetle in a community of water
beetles. They lived a simple and comfortable life in the pond
with few disturbances and interruptions.

Once in a while, sadness would come to the community when one of
their fellow beetles would climb the stem of a lily pad and
would never be seen again. They knew when this happened; their
friend was dead, gone forever.

Then, one day, one little water beetle felt an irresistible urge
to climb up that stem. However, he was determined that he would
not leave forever. He would come back and tell his friends what
he had found at the top.

When he reached the top and climbed out of the water onto the
surface of the lily pad, he was so tired, and the sun felt so
warm, that he decided he must take a nap. As he slept, his body
changed and when he woke up, he had turned into a beautiful
blue-tailed dragonfly with broad wings and a slender body
designed for flying.

So, fly he did! And, as he soared he saw the beauty of a whole
new world and a far superior way of life to what he had never
known existed.

Then he remembered his beetle friends and how they were thinking
by now he was dead. He wanted to go back to tell them, and
explain to them that he was now more alive than he had ever been
before. His life had been fulfilled rather than ended.

But, his new body would not go down into the water. He could
not get back to tell his friends the good news. Then he
understood that their time would come, when they, too, would
know what he now knew. So, he raised his wings and flew off
into his joyous new life!

~Author Unknown~



Luke's 15th Birthday
in Heaven

Lucas Christopher Ross "Luke"
October 31, 1979 - April 3, 2001
Acute Bronchopneumonia


In 1979 I became pregnant for the second time. In those days there wasn't the option of knowing the sex of your child. I wanted a little boy so bad, but I dared not whisper those words in fear that it would not come true. I already had a beautiful little two year old girl that I loved beyond words. But a little boy would just make everything perfect!

It was October and we were living in Idaho. The landscape in our little town had taken on the beauty and majesty of fall. On a cold Halloween morning, my little pumpkin was already on his way into this world. After a very long and difficult labor my sweet little baby was born. I just couldn't believe it.... it was Luke the Spook! I was so very happy to meet my little boy. As I held him for the very first time... an unexpected teardrop rolled down my face.

From that day on Luke and I were inseparable. Wherever I was, Luke wanted to be. Oh how much I loved him and oh how much he loved me. He was so much fun. Everyday I looked forward to what he would do or say. Sometimes he would make me laugh so hard....that an unexpected teardrop would find its way out.

No one has ever loved me like Luke loved me. When I was with Luke I was number one and it made me feel absolutely wonderful. He always wanted to sit by me, to hold my hand, to give me hugs, and to say he loved me. I remember when he was about 3 years old he said..."Mommy, when I grow up I want to marry you." I said... "But Luke, I am already married to Daddy." He said... "But I want to marry you." I tried to explain the difference in the love between a mommy and a daddy ... and the love between a mommy and her son. I failed miserably in my explanation, and he still thought that he could one day marry me. I told him that someday when he was older he would fall in love with a special girl and marry her. He said..."No Mommy, I will always love you." Then there it was again..... that unexpected teardrop.

As the years went by, and he began growing up he realized that he just might some day fall in love. He finally understood the difference in the two kinds of love, but he never stopped loving me in his special way and he would defend me no matter what. He would say..."Don't you be mean to my mommy". It was just a few months before Luke died at the age of 21 when he and I were walking across the parking lot of Sam's club. A car sped by me and I had to jump back to keep from being hit. Luke screamed across the parking lot at the driver..."Watch where you are going, that's my mom." He made me feel 10 feet tall and once again..... an unexpected teardrop fell.

I was so blessed, and I knew I was blessed. How could someone so beautiful and sweet and gentle love me so much? I had no answer to that question, but I do know that in his eyes I could do no wrong. I still can't believe that I was lucky enough to be loved like that. I miss him so much. I want to hear all those little boy words... "I love you Mommy", "Sit by me Mommy", "Hold me close Mommy." I want to hear all of those grown-up words.... "I love you Mom", "Can we talk Mom", "Let's sit in the swing and watch the sunset Mom." I have missed those words for a very, very long time. My son died and left me here with silence and emptiness. No more words, no more hugs, no more laughs, no more, no more, no more. My blessing, my life all turned into..... an unexpected teardrop.

Till this very day I am thankful for having such a loving person in my life for twenty-one wonderful years. It all ended way too soon. It should have changed at the end of my life, not at the end of his. But even with Luke's death I knew I was so blessed to have experienced his love. Someday soon I will be blessed again when we meet in Heaven. I will hear those long-lost words..."I love you Mom", "Can we talk Mom", "Let me show you around Mom". And as I gaze upon that shining face of his I will know that nothing was ever really lost. My little pumpkin was just waiting for me to catch up to him. As I reach for his hand, and hold him close once again, I will for the very last time experience..... an unexpected teardrop.

2015 Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001


Sometimes I think I can't make it.
I feel like my chest will explode.
It's been too many empty years
That I've had to carry this load.

Sometimes it's just one little word
That reminds me of the past
Or just the sight of something
That makes me shiver and gasp.

Sometimes in late October
I feel a lonely teardrop fall
When I come upon a pumpkin
And my mind relives it all.

Sometimes in the early spring
When April comes around
I feel another teardrop
Go tumbling to the ground.

Sometimes I wonder why I'm here.
I could drown in these tears by now.
I've lived so long without you son
And I honestly don't know how.

Someday this pain will go away.
These teardrops will be no more.
And I'll be looking for you son
As I walk through Heaven's door.

2015 - Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001


When the day is long and the night
The night is yours alone
When you're sure you've had enough
Of this life, well hang on

Don't let yourself go, 'cause everybody cries
And everybody hurts sometimes

Sometimes everything is wrong
Now it's time to sing along
When your day is night alone
(Hold on, hold on)
If you feel like letting go
(Hold on)
When you think you've had too much
Of this life, well hang on

'Cause everybody hurts take comfort in your friends
Everybody hurts

Don't throw your hand oh, no don't throw your hand
If you feel like you're alone, no, no, no, you are not alone

If you're on your own in this life
The days and nights are long
When you think you've had too much
Of this life to hang on

Well, everybody hurts sometimes, everybody cries
And everybody hurts sometimes

And everybody hurts sometimes so, hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on
Everybody hurts
No, no, no, no, you are not alone




2015 Birthday Cake

2015 Birthday Flowers

2015 Pumpkin

Luke's place at home

Luke at the Grand Canyon

Luke's Party







Luke's 16th Birthday
in Heaven

Lucas Christopher Ross "Luke"
October 31, 1979 - April 3, 2001
Acute Bronchopneumonia


OCTOBER!!!! What a glorious time of the year with pumpkins, and leaves, and talk of trick-or-treating. There is a crispness in the air that says..."Winter's on it's way." The trees will soon be barren as the leaves tumble to the ground in the brisk October wind. The dying leaves possess a beauty that can only be captured in the minds of those that truly understand the meaning of their gracefulness as they drift slowly down. These leaves reminds us that although life does come to an end, it is reborn, just as the leaves are reborn when they grace that once barren tree in early spring.

Those that have gone on before us are alive in everything around us, although the sadness of their passing will remain with us all of our days. Their quieted voices can be heard in the whisper of the breeze as it carries those beautiful leaves to another place and time. Their hidden spirit can be seen as nature repaints the landscape in vivid colors that can only be appreciated from the depths of our souls. We can catch a scent of their unforgotten essence as we are engulfed in that fragrant October chill. Their faded warmth can be felt as the sunshine from a clear blue October sky radiates upon our skin, going beneath the surface, and warming our broken hearts. Once again we will be kissed from beyond with the taste of the cool gentle October rain upon our lips, delivering that awareness that life and love never really end. Then as night falls, our minds are flooded with the memories of all those past Octobers, as we gaze up at the soft halo of the moonlight reminding us that our angels have softly and gently "fallen" to the other side. Morning and springtime are somewhere, waiting for us all.

Yes, October may bring upon us thoughts of things that have come to an end, but October also brings upon us all of the memories, and the pleasures, and the love that can never, ever be swept away by the blowing wind, or frozen by the Autumn chill, because always... always... always... there will come a time when something around us resurrects the undying thoughts of those that have given our lives a whirlwind of... purpose, joy, and precious memories.

2010 Christine Ross
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001


Nothing much has changed, my son
Since the day you up and left.
I wait for you outside the door.
I still listen for your steps.

I stare out through the window
Looking for you to arrive.
Hoping soon I'll see your car
Slowly coming up the drive.

I listen for your guitar strings
To echo from your room
And fill my ears with magic
With one of your favorite tunes

I wonder how you're doing
And what stories you could tell.
I reach out for the telephone
To call and wish you well.

I talk to you all through the day,
I laugh and sometimes cry
Just thinking of the times we had
And how we'll never say goodbye.

As the day comes to a close
I say goodnight and speak your name.
So don't you understand, my friend?
Nothing much has really changed.

2016 Christine Ross
~Bringer of Light Poetry~
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001


Got the news on Friday mornin'
But a tear I couldn't find
You showed me how I'm supposed to live
And now you showed me how to die

I was lost till Sunday morning
I wake up to face my fear
While writing you this goodbye song
I found a tear

I'm gonna miss that smile
I'm gonna miss you my friend
Even though it hurts the way it ended up
I'd do it all again
So play it sweet in heaven
'Cause That's right where you want to be
I'm not cryin' cause I feel so sorry for you
I'm cryin' for me

I got up and dialed your number
And your voice came on the line
With that old familiar message
I'd heard a thousand times it just said
Sorry that I missed you
Leave a message and god bless
I know you think I'm crazy
But I had to hear your voice again

I'm gonna miss that smile
I'm gonna miss you my friend
Even though it hurts the way it ended up
I'd do it all again
So play it sweet in heaven
'Cause That's right where you want to be
I'm not cryin' cause I feel so sorry for you
I'm cryin' for me

So play your upside down left handed
Backwards bass guitar
And I'll see you on the other side

I'm gonna miss that smile
I'm gonna miss you my friend
Even though it hurts the way it ended up
I'd do it all again
So play it sweet in heaven
'Cause That's right where you want to be
I'm not cryin' cause I feel so sorry for you
I'm cryin' for me

I'm still cryin'
I'm cryin' for me
I'm still cryin'




2016 Birthday Cake

2016 Birthday Flowers

2016 Pumpkin

Pumpkins for Luke, Dylan, & Matthew

Balloon release over the high desert near Winslow, AZ

Memorial rock stack in the high desert near Winslow, AZ

Luke's birthday celebration
at La Pasada in Winslow, AZ



Luke's 17th Birthday
in Heaven

Lucas Christopher Ross "Luke"
October 31, 1979 - April 3, 2001
Acute Bronchopneumonia


October's grace surrounds me
With a moon of harvest gold.
Soon his birthday will arrive
Without him growing old.

Autumn leaves and pumpkins
Decorate the silent graves.
Orange and golden flowers
Remind me of the coming days.

I walk the concrete sidewalk
As I think about the past.
I look beyond the statues
at the shadows that they cast.

So many lie there near him
They, too, didn't live so long.
The distant mountains whisper
"Something seems so very wrong"

I sit there on the granite bench
Staring at his name in stone
I ask him as I always do
Please, Luke, please come home.

I know that it is getting late
I should be leaving soon
But I'm waiting, always waiting
Underneath that Harvest moon.

2017 Christine Ross
~Bringer of Light Poetry~
~ in memory of Lucas Christopher Ross 1979 - 2001


Another day another life
Passes by just like mine
It's not complicated

Another mind
Another soul
Another body to grow old
It's not complicated

Do you ever wonder if the stars shine out for you?
Float down
Like autumn leaves
Hush now
Close your eyes before the sleep
And you're miles away
And yesterday you were here with me

Another tear
Another cry
Another place for us to die
It's not complicated

Another love that's gone to waste
Another light lost from your face
It's complicated

Is it that it's over or do birds still sing for you?
Float down
Like autumn leaves
Hush now
Close your eyes before the sleep
And you're miles away
And yesterday you were here with me

Ooh how I miss you
My symphony played the song that carried you out
Ooh how I miss you
And I, I miss you and I wish you'd stay

Do you ever wonder if the stars shine out for you?
Float down
Like autumn leaves
Hush now
Close your eyes before the sleep
And you're miles away
And yesterday you were here with me

Touch down
Like a seven four seven
Or stay out and we'll live forever now

Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC



2017 Birthday Cake
(Coming Soon)

2017 Birthday Flowers
(Coming Soon)

2017 Pumpkin
(Coming Soon)

2017 Balloon release
(Coming Soon)

2017 Luke's Birthday Dinner
(Coming Soon)

2017 Luke's Birthday Celebration at Home
(Coming Soon)

2017 Luke's Place at Home
(Coming Soon)


(Coming Soon)


Age 1 - 21

2001 - 2010

2011 - PRESENT



Last Entry in Luke's Journal:

"When there is love in my heart and a smile on my face,
I need nothing else." ~ Luke Ross


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